Stress Pandemic

What do we do when this world is stressing us out?  The middle of June of 2020 I found myself, like many of the people in this world, fighting off a flood of emotions from Covid19, protesting and vandalization.   My family honored a very close family friend, we’ll call Steve, as he departed for Bootcamp in the heart of this pandemic.  Even though I knew in my mind that he was going to be okay–he was safe, and that God was going to bring him back to us–his departure tipped the scale for me emotionally and caused me to stop for a moment as I realized that something was not right.

Of course the pandemic, and all that happened because of it, stressed out all of us.  Not everyone, however, handle stress in a healthy way.  Since March of 2020 there has been a rise in mental illness, depression and divorce.  It was said that there are increased reports of mental breakdowns, local violence and that domestic violence was at an all-time high.  I myself, was no longer working at full capacity at my job and was not able to do ministry in church.  I was forced to put everything on hold, released of all responsibility and still stressed out.  My world was turned upside down as, I’m sure, yours was.  I knew we were all in this together, but my brain was struggling to enjoy the much-needed pause.  I was stressed out and worried about our finances, my kid’s schooling, and how I was going to keep this mystery virus from coming into our home.

What does it really mean to be stressed and is it all bad?  Believe it or not, before Covid19 70% of Americans admitted to having stress in their life and 75% of all doctor visits are stress related 30% which are severe.  If this was the statistics before the pandemic, how much more have these numbers been elevated during it?  I’d like to first talk about how stress is defined and then how we can identify what the stressors are.  Stress is defined as a feeling of emotional or physical tension. It can come from any event or thought that makes you feel frustrated, angry, or nervous. Stress is your body’s reaction to a challenge or demand. It is a natural part of life enabling us to change, grow and produce good results in our lives.  It can also be seen as the over arousal of the adrenal system.

This definition makes it clear that stress is a normal human response on how we react to the everyday events of life.  Stress does not always have to be a bad thing.  For example kids need stress to push themselves in their schoolwork.  An athlete needs stress in order to train for a competition, just as a parent experiences the stresses to meet the needs of their children.  But you can also experience stress when an unexpected pandemic breaks out all over the world.

Oh Those Stressors?

Many of us think that stress is a bad thing but according to Tim Clinton he stated in his book, Caring For People God’s Way, that “God uses times of difficulty and adversity to stretch us and develop our character.”  Sometimes we think that those challenges are from the enemy or they are out to destroy us, but God allows difficulty to surface in our weaknesses, fears, insecurities and more.  When Clinton speaks of “character” what does he mean?  Well stress can play a part in forming (or destroying) your personality, morality, or the qualities that are used to distinguish us as individuals.  Yes, stress can build these things or destroy them, but it is how we handle what is thrown at us.  The stress we feel in these times with Covid19 and the racial wars all over the world can either build us up or it can destroy us.

So what are the stressors that can cause the stress?  Here is a list of some common main stressors:  finances, work, family, relationship, personal goals, emptiness, lack of fulfillment, irresponsible behavior on the part of others close to us, unrealistic expectations, negative attitudes, illness, trying to do too much, change, loss, a pandemic, racial wars and political confusion.

Let us tackle a few of these stressors.  Having relationships with others is a God given blessing.  Family and friends can motivate, support and provide many more benefits, but the truth is our relationships with others can cause a lot of stress.  I started off telling you about how Steve enlisted in the Marines.  He and I have a kind of a mom and son relationship and at the same time an older sister/younger brother relationship.  The moment he signed up to be a Marine he and I started bickering.  I had grown so attached to him in the last six years; we saw each other every single day, went on adventures, talked about almost anything and texted every day and, even though we were in quarantine, our families continued doing things together.  The idea of him leaving was causing so much stress on both of us (and others in the family) that we fought monthly, weekly and sometimes daily.

My response to him was often bitter or nasty and at times; I showed my stubbornness toward his feelings.  He knew that I hated the fact that he enlisted, but what made things even worse was the increasing number of confirmed cases and death during the pandemic and the racial wars.  I wasn’t comfortable with him leaving to bootcamp while our world was falling apart.  The stress of him leaving was surfacing a part of me that I have always been able to hide.  The truth was that I had fear, insecurities, a guarded behavior, and a lack of trusting God…especially with those I loved extremely.

When you are lucky enough to love someone and be loved in return, stress is an expected ingredient in several areas of your life.  For example, if a lack of financial security weighs on you, you may work harder in another area (such as in school or in your career), you will make a lot of personal goals to make yourself better for them and for yourself,  you may have unrealistic expectations and you may be wanting to do too much.

What do you do when your stressor is a worldwide pandemic followed by a racial and violent pandemic?  As much as relationships can be a painful, uncomfortable stressor—it is not the only kind of stress.  Illness and the fear of falling ill—followed by death during a pandemic—can surface a side of yourself that will bring a pressure you never expected.  I tried so hard to keep life as normal as possible but as masks, hand sanitizers and the devastating news grew, I found myself being lost in my emotions.  Life was changing not just here at home but all over the world. The overwhelming amount of death, the overcrowding of hospitals and the confusion of what to do to stop the spread of this virus, was wearing on me a little at a time, as it was everyone else.

Acute stress, according to, Caring For people God’s Way, is short-lived stress that keeps us alert to the protective response, equipping us to deal with challenges, unless they are too traumatizing.  That means the stress of a project, moving into a new home, an argument with a loved one, preparing for the birth of a child or a wedding, can cause acute stress but that is nothing to worry about.

So when does stress get dangerous?  Clinton says when any stress, good or bad, is prolonged or becomes chronic, excessive or intense and we aren’t able to recover, or remove ourselves from it, that there is a transition into distress (stress disease).  This causes adrenaline exhaustion and begins to erode the foundations of ones mental and physical health.  The mind and body are not equipped to handle the process of ongoing chronic stress.

This I Know

God created man to have acute stress because again He uses things like that to create character and personality.  Our design was never to have excessive stress even if it is for a good reason.  Sadly, many people all over the world are embarking on this as some have experienced prolonged stress when they cannot move forward from a stressor.  What do we do when a pandemic is going on 7 months, unemployment checks have stopped, politicians are fighting each other instead of fighting for their country, flames are still blazing from looters and our relationships are crumbling?  I remember when I was going on two months of random weeping.  I could not find joy in anything long enough to get the bad thoughts out of my head.  I wanted to scream so loud that I shattered my voice box while having an uncontrollable tantrum.

Weeks after Steve left, I remember sitting on the floor of my room and just wept bitterly.  I had no words to explain where my mind was to my family.  I was not just weeping for Steve but his absence prolonged where I was.  My daughter Rachel joined me on the floor and cried with me while my husband sat quietly, not knowing what to do to stop the tears.  I said, “I don’t know what to do.  I can’t get out of this.  I don’t know what is wrong with me.”  As I sat on my floor barely able to catch my breath, I knew I needed God.

God came to my rescue and, if you are experiencing your own form of stress, he will come to yours as well.  Join me next week as I explain how He came to my rescue and how He can do the same for you. I will also talk about how we respond to stress.  Maybe there are things you are doing or in your life that you never realized could be attributed to stress.  In the weeks to come we are going to talk about the behaviors we exhibit when we are seriously stressed.  When we are overly stressed anxiety, fear and stinking thinking starts. We will be addressing and talking about these things over weeks.

No one can do this alone.  If you do not have a therapist or a counselor that you can go to, here is a link to Bedrock Ministries Bedrock Ministries.  Bedrock is a counseling ministry that will help walk you through this painful season.  They are a counseling ministry that can at least can advise and begin to point you in the right direction.  We would also love to be there for you.  Please feel free to contact us through our email at thruthewinters@gmail.com or comment below.