Hey everyone Samuel here again.  We are taking on the topic of Fathers this month.  First, I want to say HAPPY FATHER’S DAY to all the dads out there!!!  Second, if you haven’t noticed on our website, I chose as a recommended book to read on the topic of Fathers “Be A Better Dad Today”, by Gregory W. Slayton.  In this book, Slayton first talks about the importance of fathering, then spends the rest of the book going through, what he calls, “The Ten Tools of Fatherhood”.   I strongly recommend that you dads and granddads get this book and include it as a resource on developing your life as a father.  It is also a very great read for husbands with no children as well, because it also discusses the importance of the relationship between husband and wife.

Empowering Servant Leadership

            What does it take to be a father dedicated to being a servant leader?  I would like to touch on a chapter of the book titled, “Empowering Servant Leadership”.  The sub-text of this chapter reads, “Empowering your family by putting their needs above your own will yield rich benefits today… and for generations to come.  This is the essence of fatherhood.”  Sacrificing your desires and wants can be a very difficult thing.   It takes courage and willingness, to lose something that might matter dearly to you.  Sacrificial love is a must for any dad who wishes to become a good father.  I share the same opinion as Slayton, when he says that “Jesus is the perfect example of an empowering servant leader.”  Whether you are a believer who lives your life in truth that He was the son of God or not, the lessons Jesus taught His followers about life is to be commended.

History, both from and outside of scripture, records that the men Jesus taught changed their lives. They dedicated themselves to impacting the lives of others for the gospel.  They dedicated their lives to the example Jesus laid out for them from both His words and actions.  He took a handful of men that history would have otherwise overlooked, and made them leaders among leaders.

What is the True Calling of a Dad

A Servant Leader:  One who is willing to lead others by example, not just by words.  He is ready to put his own safety on the line for those who have been entrusted to his care.  He is willing to sacrifice his comfort, logic, and even his life in order to provide a better chance for others to succeed.

Sounds like Jesus to me.  In fact, He told His disciples once that if they wanted the true responsibility of leadership they needed to recognize what that meant.  They needed to know that it was not something that will come easy and that even with all He possessed His leadership came with a price.

The Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve and to give His life, a ransom for many.             – Matt. 20:28

And likewise is the call of a father.  Our families need to know that the priorities of the whole matter more to us than that of our own.  Placing the family’s best interest before that of any individual is a priority.  For the believer, our families need to see that all we do and all we are, point towards Christ.

Let’s be honest.  Dads get a bad rap for the most part.  We are considered lazy, unaffectionate, clueless, selfish, inconsiderate, childish, and the list can go on and on.  Now, most of us receive these titles and more because we haven’t provided many examples of positive traits to be called.

When I took on the role of youth pastor several years ago there was a kid about 9 years old who was running around the church.  My wife told him to stop and go sit down but nothing she said to him got his attention.  She eventually said, “If you don’t stop I am going to call your father.”

He looked at her and laughed as he said, “Go ahead, call my father.  He doesn’t care.  He cares nothing about me.”  Sadly, this kid was not exaggerating as he was in the center of a family with a disconnected father who sought his own needs over theirs.  This young man grew to be a bitter, rebellious young man craving the acceptance of his father and when he never got it, he turned to self destructive behaviors.

Children Obey But Father’s Don’t Provoke

See these are some common things you hear in today’s society but that’s not true of all fathers.  Even the “good” dads get branded time to time as bad,  leaving one to feel like we lose either way.  For me, I say, “Thank you Jesus for your mercy and grace.”  I know I am not perfect, but I believe in and choose to serve, a perfect God.  As I study scripture more and more, I learn more of the God I serve and the example He sent in Christ Jesus.   I read the lessons given by the lives of those from scripture and try to reflect it back into my life.  One of the biggest lesson taught to men in scripture, is that of fatherhood and the responsibilities placed on them in mentoring and protecting the souls of the young.  The Amplified Bible puts it this way…

Fathers, do not irritate and provoke your children to anger, do not exasperate them to resentment, but rear them tenderly in the training and discipline and the counsel and admonition of the Lord.  – Eph. 6:4

As a father of four, working a job schedule that does not really have a set time of punching in and punching out, it’s not always easy to give attention to the needs of my kids when they want it.  I understand however that they are never to become second to my work.  They are my first ministry and my first responsibility.   I may have an errand to finish or a task to complete, but it is my responsibility to make sure that at the end of each day they know that I am not just their father by nature, but also by my actions.

Do you understand that your children are your ministry?  They are the ones you attend to, teach and guide through life.  Can you do that if you see that your job is the only way to attend to their needs?  Or maybe you think showing them a hard working father is an example of life.  Sadly, that sounds right but in the end a neglected child causes irritation and provokes the child to anger.

I will never say that being a father is an easy job and ladies, nor am I saying that mothering is easy, far from it.  Parenting PERIOD is a hard and important job.  It’s not for the lazy, fickle or unmotivated.  That is why we need the Lord in all we do and strive to become.

In order to be the father that God has called us to be, we must first submit ourselves as His servants.  Submitting to His authority and allowing Him to be our Lord.  Then we become His disciples, learning from Him how we are to live and behave.  We develop under His teachings courage, authority, and knowledge.  He then challenges us to use what we learn in our everyday life.  He encourages us to go and teach those He has placed before us.  We evolve then to Servant Leadership ones who lead by example, willing to sacrifice our comfort for sake of those entrusted to us all so that we can help in securing their calling and future.

Fatherhood, a call to Servant Leadership and a task not to be taken lightly.

-Samuel

Weekly Challenge:

You will notice that on the homepage we have the book, “Be a Better Dad Today.”  It is obviously not a book that will erase mistakes that were made or keep you from ever making a mistake but this book is so good in giving some good basic guidelines to being that servant father.  Purchase the book for yourself or buy it as a belated Father’s Day gift.

Also if you have enjoyed the pictures on our website, Elizabeth Madaia photography is opening up their summer schedules for all those that follow Through the Winters ministry.  If you can get to the Suffolk County area you can get a 10% discount when you give the code THRUTHEWINTERS when ordering your package.  You can go to Elizabeth Madaia Photography Facebook to see all the different options and pictures.

Feel free to comment below or email me on the side if you would like to have a private conversation.  We appreciate you!!