What Are They Going To Be

Working in youth for 17 years has challenged my faith in sooooo many ways. My first youth group that my husband and I pastored will continue to be the center of growth within our ministry. Young people are not easy to minister to. They can be guarded and stubborn. We were leading a group in the inner city so the challenges that they faced was not on a small scale. They definitely tested our patience to say the least. So many times I wanted to take one of my teens and beat the sin out of them and there were those that made me want to scream till I lost my voice — both I may have done at one time or another. Other times, they could make me so angry that I could have slapped their mama twice and repented later. But then there were times they made me laugh so hard when my own world was falling apart.

Youth ministry taught me a lot about God and his love. There was a young man that came into our group who battled with lying, rebellion, lust and anger. When he first came I caught him in lie after lie and it took everything in me to not lose it with him. This young man tried to change, but he was failing badly. He kept making bad choices, but God put a love in my heart that I had never had before for him and all the other kids. This young man was not alone in his constant battle with sin. The whole youth group lost the battle against their desires at some point. The love that I had for the kids was not determined by the right decisions they made. God gave me a vision of each kid that I got to know and this vision was of what they were going to be if they just surrendered. I fell in love with who they were going to become and not who they were at the moment. I didn’t mentor them by what they did in the present, but who they were destined to become in the future.

Trusting The Love Of Their Leader

You see each and every young person that God gave Sam and I trusted us enough to share the dysfunction of their lives. There were kids who didn’t know if their parents were going to be drunk and in a violent state when they went home. Some lived in homes where their father was beating their mother to a pulp. There were others that were living in flea infested apartments and were coming to youth group with dirty clothes because their homes were filthy. I even had girls coming to our group that were sharing a room with their relative that was molesting them. God gave me so much compassion for them because I remembered where I use to be when I was their age.

In the slim of life, God was showing me love when I did not deserve it. I can count on one hand how many times my parents initiated affection towards me or reassured acceptance of me. I needed my parents to show me what real affection was as a pre-teen or teenager. After being violated I was a magnet for sexual predators. Some sought me out and others I welcomed with open arms. As horrible as it sounded, that season of molestation was the time I saw as affection, yes distorted, dysfunctional affection, but it was better than what I was receiving… nothing. My father thought about inventive ways of beating me so badly that he left scars — this way I could not wear a skirt or bathing suit. I can count on one finger how many times he put his arms around me with love, and he was half way drunk when it happened.

I was so desperate that at 7 years old that I engaged in detestable things, so detestable that it would be distasteful to even get into. How could God love me after all that I was doing? How could he love me when he knew every disgusting, wicked thought that I had? Why in the world could he want me, I was tainted and invaluable? I could understand why he wanted to rescue me but why love me ? Yes he saw every detestable thing I did but he also saw all the things that were done to me. His love was not determined by what I did but who I was. You see God knew exactly what I would become if I would accept his help and let him rescue me. I needed love — but love that was not conditional. How was I going to have a real relationship with God if he loved me as my parents loved me? I needed someone who would love me unconditionally because even after I surrendered to the power of his love, I knew I would need grace and mercy because I was still flawed.

Before You Had A Name, You Were Called By Name

Can we talk for a minute — do you question God’s love? Do you think that his love for you is contingent on your successes or your failures? Do you think that the love of God is conditional? I obviously struggled with that then I came across this scripture years ago.

Jeremiah 1:5,
5 “Before I formed you in the womb I knew[a] you,
before you were born I set you apart;
I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.” NIV

When I see that God knew me before my parents knew me, loved me before my parents had me, I am blown away! You are no different: you were known and loved by God before life started for you. God loves you for who you are not for what you do.

Take some time to meditate on this verse. What does the verse above, Jeremiah 1:5, mean for you? Write your thoughts down. Do you believe it? What is your understanding of how God knows you and loves you? In this verse he is speaking to Jeremiah about who he will be. Do you believe that God knows who you are going to become? We would love to hear from you in the comments! If you want to hear more of my testimony, purchase our book, “The Threshing: A Weapon Forged by Fire.” Sign up here to read the first three chapters for free, and you can also buy the full book on Amazon.