Come On God, I’m Angry

Could we ever have a real relationship with God and never get angry? Getting together with my younger brother is always a time of pure laughter and a trip down memory lane. One of my brother’s favorite stories he loves to tell is when I “hulked out.” In the late 90’s a landline phone was everything to a teenage girl; it was almost like her new right arm. My mother knew that, but could careless that I was growing attached to my landline due to my growing popularity in church and my relationship with Sam. My mother did things to annoy me like, making a phone call just when she knew I was about to get on the phone or keeping my friends on hold while she talked for hours.

My mother aggravated me more every time; however, one day I lost my temper when I was on the phone with Sam and a call came in for her. I put the person on hold, let her know Sam was on the other line sooooo…instead of telling the person she would call them back, she took the call and then nestled herself on her bed, propped up her feet and then started her ascent into her extremely long conversation. I gave her a minute and then interrupted her to remind her that Sam was on hold. She condescendingly looked at me and said, “Well he is going to have to wait.” She continued talking and then I came back again more furious. “Mom! Sam is on the phone.” She ignored me and then started talking about me to her friend, “You see this girl. She forgets who pays the bills”, then laughed with her friend. She then clicked over to Sam and told him I would call him later. As if I had an out of body experience, I could see myself jumping on the bed slapping her with the phone and screaming at the top of my lungs.

Instead, I went into the room screamed under my breath, and thought of how I could let out the anger that was building up like a volcano that God picked up and was shaking up before it erupted. My younger brother was sitting in the corner trying not to be seen, for fear that I would target him. I could have lifted our 7 story apartment building with my bare hands and thrown it across the highway if I got the chance. Instead, I ripped the grate off the huge heater in our room like it was a sheet of paper and proceeded to bend that grate like it was a long melted tootsie roll. My brother coward even more in the corner as I “hulked out.”

When we mention that story we all laugh, especially my brother and I, while my mother sits a little shocked because she remembered that grate was bent, but had no idea what had happened to the heater. My brother boasted how it took two maintenance guys from the apartment building to try and return it back to shape.

Why Do I Get So Angry

Anger has been the thing that has fueled me for so long. What causes you to get angry? Talking on the phone while my man waits on the other line won’t get me furious today, but other things can flare me up in the same way. Has your anger stirred up when your preferred Politian is being represented wrong or when the corruption of the government is so obvious, and no one does anything? Are you amongst the Christians who are appalled of how liquor stores are considered essential while churches are being closed down? How do you feel about the small number of police officers who devalue the lives of those in the black community? Or, how about the black lives who are demanding their lives to matter in one area, but don’t seem to value other black’s lives in other areas or who see things differently than they do? Does your anger rage in you as the small business around us has to a close because the government won’t help them get through this because of their own personal feuds? How about when you talk with someone who, you thought, had the same mindset as you on certain matters but yet now because they don’t see your side of things they become narrow-minded, crude, raw, rude, unreasonable, and biased? Or maybe your anger is more fueled by personal matters like a backstabbing family member, financial issues, fake friends, or a toxic family past.

First, let’s ask the question, is anger a sin? I have heard preaching’s of how anger is a sin but that goes against a lot of scripture such as when Jesus got angry in the temple? Let’s look at Judges 2:12-14

They forsook the Lord, the God of their ancestors, who had brought them out of Egypt. They followed and worshiped various gods of the peoples around them. They aroused the Lord’s anger because they forsook him and served Baal and the Ashtoreths. In his anger against Israel the Lord gave them into the hands of raiders who plundered them. He sold them into the hands of their enemies all around, whom they were no longer able to resist.

Yes, it’s true, God gets angry. Think about how many times you have to talk to a child over and over again. Do you get angry? Do you have to bring a correction? Well, so does God. We are his children and we are stubborn, self-seeking, self-centered, and prideful. We forget our role and do things our own way. In these verses, you can see that God does have anger. Let’s look at Ephesians 4:25-27

Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body. “In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.

These verses are sometimes misunderstood to say that anger is sin, but the emphasis clearly is “IN” your anger… meaning that when you are angry, do not sin. Anger should never rage to such a level that you are out of control and forget who you are. Sometimes, we want to be God and want to do things our way, how we see it, and respond and react when angered that can bring pain to ourselves or worse begin to hurt others. When we become angered, we have to be careful not to allow our mouths to speak in ways that cause us to lose ourselves.

When is Anger Sin?

• When our thoughts go into a place that is violent or abusive.  One of the reasons we get so verbally abusive is when we feel like we are not getting heard. When we are not getting through, we either hit below the belt just to get the person to shut up or because they seem like they are going to swing verbally and even physically. How can we get our voices heard when those in front of us don’t care about listening?
• When we stop talking about the issue and start devaluing others to raise ourselves up. When we can’t get our voices heard we look at those in front of us and we target their flaws—we think are flaws—and proceed to devalue them so that we can feel better about ourselves. We don’t want that feeling of being powerless—or devalued as someone or another situation—as some made us feel, so we need to take back the power and appear stronger than those we are against. If we can lower their value then they are not worth listening to, making peace with, or paying attention to. They are just stupid, losers; that have no idea what they are talking about.
•  When we allow anger to produce stubbornness, envy, fear, unforgiveness which dictates our decisions.  Anger becomes sin when we allow it to cloud our judgment, distort vision of those we love, and act in a way that is outside of our character.  If it isn’t a sin but I do get angry, what am I supposed to do with it? Let’s look at James 1:19-21

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you.

The Bible says in these moments be …

1. Be quick to listen– Stop thinking of the next thing you are going to say and listen to what is being said to you.

2. Slow to speak– Before you utter a word, take a moment to censor yourself, think of what was said and think about how God would want you to respond. When you are slower to speak, you are less likely to have to apologize for saying something you will regret.

3. Even slower to be angry– Think about what is making you angry? Is it injustice, behavior that hurts someone else or is it unresolved issues within yourself? Are these issues someone else has caused or is it from the current events? Is your anger rooted in selfishness or righteousness?

4. Get rid of moral filth and evil– Think about how much of your anger is from the behavior of your own that is not right. Get rid of those things that are displeasing to God so that those moments of anger produces something good.

During these times, anger rises in the most unexpected way.  You don’t have to do this alone.  Please reach out to us so that we can help you.  Comment below or contact us at thruthewinters@gmail.com.  You are appreciated.