Filth In A Dress

Have you ever had a friend tell you about their opinion of someone before you met them?  How much weight do you put in their compliments or reservation of the unknown person?  I know for me if my best friends tell me that there is someone coming that is loving, caring, funny or even untrustworthy, rude, etc…I will have their description in the back of my mind no matter what I experience firsthand.  At the age of 7, when God introduced himself to me for the first time, I already got the scoop on him from my Sunday School teachers and it wasn’t too pleasant.

I was not raised in a Christian home. A wonderful family took me to church while my parents stayed home on Sunday mornings. Other children were dressed up in their Sunday best and so was I. However, my clothes did not mirror who I was. I was a child stripped of the adequate parental love and affection. My faith in others was lost because those who were supposed to protect me stole my innocence. I was living in a world turned upside down from my turbulent childhood. I was faced with intense bullying and became a bully at a very young age. I started to do many things that I would later regret. Along with that, by the time I walked into the doors of the church I was in the beginning stages of my struggle with sexual addiction.

How do you minister to a child like that? Well it was at church that I learned about God’s love, strength, and power. Who was this God? My definition of God at 7 years of age was some invisible being who wanted to come into my life with a new set of unreachable rules and regulations — that’s how I saw him because that’s how he was introduced to me. If I didn’t follow these “rules” I was going to be punished—I was used to that, so no big deal.

Hell… Yes, I Want In!

I remember one lesson in particular where my teacher started talking to us about two different men. One man lived his life the way he wanted to and there was another man who was the Christian who followed after God. The Christian did what God told him to do and was able to go into this magical land called Heaven. The other man was sent to this horrible place called hell, to be tortured because he was a liar, a thief, and lived his life the way he wanted to.

When you talk to a little girl like me — who was entering into the world of sexual addiction, who cursed like a sailor and had the temper like an unstable bomb — hearing about hell was a relief;I just wanted a place. Heaven, to me, was an unreachable standard. It was for good little girls and boys like some of the friends I was meeting at church. They lived lives of magical rainbows and unicorns, while I was doing everything not to drown in my slimy sin filled life every single day.

How could someone like me ever make it to Heaven?  If I stubbed my toe going to school I used potty words.  This place seemed so much more comforting because I could fail and fall every single day of my life and my status in hell wouldn’t be moved.  I could blow up in school and beat someone to a pulp and not worry because hell was for failures, losers, liars, the violent and more.

I never felt angry towards my Children’s Church teacher for her lesson, but at that age everything is an introduction. She was introducing me to my God. She was setting the stage for where my foundation would be built. She was doing the best she could. Nonetheless, the truth is that there is not one story in the Bible where God introduces himself and hell to an unbeliever. My introduction to God through my teacher was nothing short of wrong. In the world we live in, Christians are known for listing those who are going to hell, but they forget that they were once on that list. Unfortunately, some Christians present God as a divine master who has a hardened heart towards those who need him.

There was a man in the Bible called Saul. He was one of the worst characters in the New Testament. Saul persecuted and killed many Christians because he thought he was doing the right thing. God got a hold of him by knocking him off his high horse, so to speak, and confronted him. Surely God would tell this guy he was going to hell if he didn’t shape up. In Acts 9:1, 3-5 you will see their first conversation:

“Meanwhile, Saul was still breathing out murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples. […]3 As he neared Damascus on his journey, suddenly a light from heaven flashed around him. 4 He fell to the ground and heard a voice say to him, “Saul, Saul, why do you persecute me?”
5 “Who are you, Lord?” Saul asked.
“I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting,” he replied.”

As you read on, never once did God say to this murderous, violent, self-centered, self-righteous, foul-mouthed Pharisee that he was going to hell, there was no one else that needed that knowledge more than him.

God’s Not Scared of Rejection

I was about 7, maybe 8 years old–way too young to complicate the voice of God, when he spoke to me. It was at this time that the Lord straight up asked me about when I was going to give in and let him into my life. I made it clear to him that I had gotten a bad deal in this life. I had a mother who was not around, a father that couldn’t stand me and now a God who wanted to be a “Father” to me.

I rejected God the day I had my first conversation with him. Even though I rejected him, He did not turn around to tell me where my end would be.  All God wanted me to know was that He was there and He wasn’t going anywhere. He wanted to let me know that there was more to him than what I had experienced thus far. He knew I needed just to know that He was real and when I was ready, He was ready for a relationship and was willing to clean the dirt/sin off of me.

I don’t know where you are, but has anyone ever reminded you of how your actions make you a perfect candidate for hell? Well that may very well be, but the truth is that every single human being who is born in this wretched world is a candidate for hell—even the best of the best. I want to tell you that God did not send His only Son to this earth to be tortured just to remind everyone where they are going without him in their lives.  He died a horrific death on the cross so that He could rescue us from eternity in Hell!

Practical Thinking

I want to talk to those that are ministering to someone who is living a very wretched life style.

1. Make sure that you contribute to a healthy first impression-when you are ministering to someone who has gone through a lot in life.  Your view of God plays a big part in the way they receive him for the first time.
2. Take some time to review how you define God’s character.  Is yours definition one that lines up to the word or do you battle with some things clarity yourself.
3. Don’t focus on their filth, but instead focus on their potential.  Those who come to God in filth don’t need you to focus on their hurt, pain, sin or habits.  They need you to fix your eyes on what God can do, so that their garment of sin will be too uncomfortable.
4. When you can root yourself in their future with God, they will be more prone to let go of anything that keeps them back.

Don’t forget who God is to you. If we have been saved for a long time we sometimes forget the path we had to walk in order to be with God.  Take the time to remember your positive impression of God and share it.  In honesty, share where you were when you understood who God really was and be patient with their experiences.

Weekly Challenge:

We at Through the Winters want to be there for you as you take a journey to learn the true heart of God. Has your view of God and his heart for you been distorted by other’s imperfect, limited, uncertain ideas? Is it possible that you are relating to God the way others have told you to relate to Him without really searching him out for yourself? We would love to hear from you in the comments below or via email. I want to encourage you to get our book, The Threshing: A Weapon Forged By Fire if you were battling with some of the things mentioned. Sign up here to read the first three chapters for free! You can also buy the full book on Amazon.