When Enough is Enough

Have you ever gotten to a point where you’re just tired of being pooped on? One thing after another comes knocking at the door and it never stops; the challenges keep coming. Has there ever come a time when you finally said enough is enough!!  Well at a very young age I found myself fed up. I was about 9 years old, maybe 10, when a band of boys in my school started bullying me regularly. They made fun of everything that I wore and everything I said, mercilessly. They tripped me, pushed me and cursed at me regularly. I had my moments when I was backed up in a corner and was forced to fight the leader of the group. I never really beat him enough for him to leave me alone, just enough for the attack to be over. He just kept coming back. It was a few years of me fighting this kid until one day I had had enough.

Most 5th graders were excited for school to end so they can go home but that was not the case for me.  It was 3 pm and everyone was excited to pack up and get on line for dismissal. I was about to begin my 10-minute walk to my father’s job when the class bully, and his friends, came behind me throwing insult after insult. I stopped near the swings to face my attackers. For years, I had been the target of his antagonizing.  I did what I could to hold my own.  Today, their attacks and insults had gone on long enough. This was the day when I was going to stop running.

What makes you stop running from something you once feared? Would you call yourself a fighter or a fleer? As a child, fear was the spirit that dominated my home. You never really knew what mood to expect with my dad. He battled with so much anger that he created a daughter who mirrored the same within herself. Anger consumed me and with no proper outlet; when I did find a release, my anger it was out of control.  So, some cases caused me to fight. It wasn’t until the fighter in me came out that I realized who I had slowly become.  Did I hate abuse? Absolutely! Did I hate the rage that was consuming me? No doubt, I did! But something about those moments I experienced with my father developed, within me, a girl who would never run from a fight. Even if I knew I was going to lose, I didn’t back away. I couldn’t fight my dad, but there was no way I’d let anyone else control or abuse me.

Put Up or Shut Up

The boys came up from behind me and started mouthing off as usual. For some reason, when I stopped at the swings  in the play ground, I was so angry that I could not speak. They took my silence as weakness. The leader of the group walked up to me and slapped me across the face–knocking my new pink tinted glasses off my face. The glasses fell into a ditch that was to the side of the swings. The other boys laughed as tears filled my face. I eyed them all down and then glanced at my glasses on the side. “What are you going to do?”, the leader taunted. I didn’t say anything, he scoffed at me and then motioned for his guys to follow him as he walked away in the opposite direction of my father’s job.

I went into the ditch, picked up my glasses, put them in my book bag with the thought, “How much longer am I going to let this keep going? I need this to stop. I’m done!” I was tired of fighting just enough to be left alone for the day. This needed to end, and I wanted it to end now!  Have you ever asked yourself how much longer are you going to keep letting things happen to you?  Have you gotten to the point where you are tired of fighting just enough to be left alone for the day?

So, I walked towards the boys with no plan or idea of how this was going to play out. I didn’t care how many of them there were; I just knew that they were not going to bully me anymore. One of them noticed I was approaching and told the leader. He turned around and said, “Oh you want more?” I still couldn’t get any words to come out of my mouth, but I began to cry harder. No sound came from my mouth, yet my eyes were filling with tears of anger, rage, frustration, and fear; fear that this will be how I had to live my life day after day, fist after fist.

I stood there, hands clenched, face full of tears and breathing heavy. One of the boys, upon seeing me like this, suggested to the leader that he leave me alone. He then pointed out that my father had a reputation for being crazy so they didn’t want to mess with me too much. The bully did not listen.  Instead, he continued to taunt me. Taking off his book bag, he continued to run his mouth. He took a step toward me and I jumped on him like a cheetah on a rabbit. The other boys jumped back surprised as I placed all my weight on the bully pinning him on a parked car nearby. Then my mouth opened. With each swing of my fist, I screamed into this boys face and released the rage that had been building up in me.
A motorist drove up to our brawl and scolded…HIM… for fighting a girl. The driver told all four of us to get out of there and go home. The humiliated bully picked up his stuff and started on his way. This was the time that I should have walked the other way to go to my father’s job, however, I was not done. I wanted this boy to never mess with me again.  But didn’t feel that I had put enough fear in him that he would not come back.   I followed the boys with determination in my heart. It would be over when I felt like this was done. I followed behind the boys and the leader.  “What are you doing?” He asked.  It was in my eyes that I was now preying on him like he preyed on me. I wanted him to know what it felt like to be stalked and I wanted him to be afraid.

Eventually, he stopped walking and turned to confront me. The moment he turned to me, I attacked him. He was going to learn that I was not going to be afraid anymore and he did. That day was the last altercation he and I ever had with each other.

I am not here to push physical altercation, but I tell you that story to make this point. We have an enemy who is not of flesh and blood but of spirit. This enemy wants us to grow weary and weak. He throws trials and tribulations that make us want to give up. Like the bully, we must face the enemy and insults.  There has to come to a point when we stop and confront him. God has equipped us with His word, a weapon that gives us the ability to stomp and trample on our enemy. That weapon is of no use though if we don’t use it and use it well.

Why Are You Fighting?

It wasn’t until over a year or so later that that same bully tried to raise his head at me again but I shut him down real quick. I reminded him of the pounding I gave him in front of his friends and, said with confidence, that I could easily do it again.  With God by our side, how much more confident should you and I be when the enemy tries to rise up against us? Jesus died and resurrected, defeating the enemy for us.  We need to put the enemy on notice that even if he does attempt to come at us again, he will regret that moment; we have the victory.  God has made us fighters but are we fighting a good fight or fighting just enough to get by? If it’s just enough to get by, trust me, eventually you will grow tired of fighting and that’s when you will be the most vulnerable to fall.
In 1 Sam 17, David in the Bible was a perfect example of this. When Goliath kept bullying the Israelites for 40 days and the soldiers hid for fear of defeat, everything changed when David showed up on the battlefield. He was not going to allow the enemy to live one more day spewing out insults and mindless threats. David was an Israelite who was appalled that the other soldiers ran from the challenge of fighting Goliath.  When it came for him to face the giant, David didn’t put on the normal armor or throw out mindless threats; he took 5 stones and a slingshot and didn’t run FROM the battle. 1 Samuel 17:48 says that he ran quickly TOWARDS the battle. When that 16-year-old swung his slingshot, causing the giant to fall down in defeat; David conquered the bully. But God doesn’t call us to be conquerors. That’s right!! According to Romans 8:37, we learn that

“We are MORE than conquerors through Him who loves us.”

That means that we don’t just win, we dominate because of Christ’s love for us! We defeat the enemy so bad that he thinks twice before coming back again. David stunned Goliath, but he was more than a conqueror when he cut the head of that 9 foot giant with his own sword.

Weekly Challenge:

How do we become such a fighter? How do becomes such a threat that the enemy is scared to come against us? In the month of April, we will be talking about ways that we can become the soldier God has called us to be.  Join us this month to see what God says about the best way to overcome our enemy.

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