I Smell Something

Have you ever smelt the stench of someone’s stinkin’ thinkin’? When Sam and I got together, I never thought that doing my daughters’ hair would be such a struggle and so expensive. I spend so much money buying products, getting hair ties, bonnets, and other accessories to make them look cute. One day when Rachel was about 5 years old, she said that she didn’t like her hair. I was shocked because her hair texture is what I absolutely dreamt about; the softness, the curls, and the baby hair look. For some reason, she didn’t see things as I did. Something didn’t seem right and as I continued to talk to her, I realized that her dislike was not normal.

About a year and a half before, Sam and I decided to leave the Bronx, where her hair texture was completely common amongst the Hispanic and African American community. She was cute but she was not unique in her look. However, we were in a community with mostly Caucasian kids and Rachel’s look was very unique. When she went to pre-school and kindergarten, her hair was the talk of the kids and some of her classmates made unfavorable comments. They said her hair was weird because it wasn’t straight and the curls were different. She begged me to straighten her hair and at first, we didn’t know why. After finding out about why she wanted her hair to be straight, I refused to allow her way of thinking about herself to be encouraged. What does my 5-year-old Rachel have in common with each of us no matter what age we are? Rachel suffered from faulty thinking and if we are honest, we all can admit to a time when we’ve done the same.

Faulty Thinking

What is exactly is faulty thinking though? It is believing that we need to be perfect, that we have to have everyone’s love and approval, or even thinking that our performance is what gains acceptance. At times, it can be an excuse used to support bad habits and thought patterns in our lives. Over the years I’ve ministered to many about how they see themselves. Some of the hardest people I ministered to are those who refuse to take the blame for where they are in life or understand why their struggles are so complicated. They place the blame of their misfortune on others which allows for them to possess a victim mentality; if fault can be placed on the behavior of a parent’s shortcomings or a spouse’s unfaithfulness, or rejection from friends, then this gives the one on the receiving end a pass, justifying their thinking and view of themselves. Outside events are also blamed for stinking thinking. How could we think positively when this world is literally going to hell? How are we supposed to have hope when the world has taken away our hope? How are we supposed to enjoy life when life as we know it is being squeezed from us?

God has said, that we must keep our thoughts on things that are true Philippians 4:8

Finally, [a]believers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable and worthy of respect, whatever is right and confirmed by God’s word, whatever is pure and wholesome, whatever is lovely and brings peace, whatever is admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think continually on these things [center your mind on them, and implant them in your heart].

He said to put all imaginations under control…2 Cor 10:5

“We destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey Christ.”

These were all things that God told us to do, knowing what we were going to go through. God has never asked us to do something that is beyond our ability.

Another thing that plays a part to our faulty thinking is the deceptive lies Satan plants in us. One day I was talking with a young man who was struggling with his self-esteem. He felt like he would never ever have a family and that he was not good enough. I gave him homework and told him to write down the top 10 lies he tells himself. The following week he came with a list of lies that he thought about himself. His list was clearly lies by the enemy. I sat there and listened to all 10 and then said to him, “Do you see a problem with this homework and your response?” He was a little confused by my question. I said, “How do you know something is a lie?” He looked at me and then I answered, “You only know what a lie is when you know the truth.” BINGO!! You see, like this young man, we know the truth but allow ourselves to substitute the truth with a lie unconsciously. I mean think about it my friend…since when does our enemy tell the truth about us? Never! They will say the opposite to hide your strength. So, as much as we want to play the victim to our lies, we expose ourselves the moment we admit we know the lies from the truth.

Now that we have left ourselves vulnerable to the truth, we must understand that these lies cause damage. Lies destroy the things that God has been trying to create in us and they place us in bondage. Specifically, it destroys our peace, our joy, and our feeling of safety all as our future crumbles under the stress and anxiety we feel. When I speak of bondage, imagine not only being in a prison cell but also chained to the bars of a prison, which some of us may already be in.

My Mind Is All Over The Place

Other than Satan, how else are these lies created? Well, the truth is we can play a part in creating the lies we believe as well. We do that through irrational and wrong thinking based on misperceptions and misbelief. We have to be honest at some point that many times we experience stress and anxiety because we allow our minds to go all over the place and we don’t stop our thoughts in their tracks. We allow ourselves to take what is really happening and then allow our brains to transport us into a land of lies. The only way we can be set free from excess stress, anxiety, and bondage is when we finally admit our part in where our mind goes.

What is truth thinking? Truth thinking is where we allow the Bible to show us why we believe what we believe. For example…

If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do. – James 1:5-8

Why do we struggle with stress, anxiety, and fear? We don’t have wisdom in the situations we are in. God makes it clear that if we need wisdom in any situation, He will give it to us. However, because we do not go to God for wisdom, instead we go back and forth in our decisions and become unstable in ALL our ways. Wow, just because we don’t ask God, for one thing, look at what challenges we face in other things. Realize though, that asking for wisdom is not our only job, we also must learn to wait, listen, and obey. The truth is that stress causes us to make decisions out of impulses and fear which causes us to live feeling like nothing can be trusted; life is always tossing us left and right.

How do we mature in our thinking? What do we need to remember so that we can destroy faulty thinking? There are three things we can start doing to reduce stress, anxiety, and faulty thinking.

1. You were created in God’s image– How does knowing that we are created in God’s image change our situation? When I look at my children and see a reflection of myself, it makes me love my children so much more. My daughters are always amazed when they discover something about themselves that I have or do, as well. As a mom, I did not purposely make my children this way. This was God’s doing but when you know that God loves you so much that he purposely made us look like him, why wouldn’t he come to our rescue? How could he stare at a version of himself in need and not help?

2. Don’t just know truth but think truth-When we stop, sit and speak candidly, we know truth, but we won’t think truth. Why wouldn’t we think truth? Because then we can’t justify our wrongful behavior, lack of trust in God, and our rash decisions. Thinking truth leaves no room for the behaviors we hate but habitually do.

3. Truth sets us free– Look at this…John 14:6 Jesus said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.”

Jesus tells us he is not just the way, but he is the TRUTH and he gives us life. How does he give us life? Look at what John 8:31-32 says,… “If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” 

When we allow God into our life, we must confess our sins, repent—stop doing life the way we were doing it before—, believe Jesus is capable of setting us free, and then accept God’s grace.

Today, 12 years later, Rachel saw that her need to look like everyone was based on a lie. I showed Rachel with truth that she is beautiful, perfect in her appearance and that the more she learns to love her differences the better she would be. As her relationship with God grew, he surfaced her insecurities so she could get healing in her thinking. When she distinguished the lies others spoke over her and the lies she told herself, she walked with much more confidence and so will you. She had to reset her mind and keep it set.

Can you relate to any of these thoughts? Do you struggle with trying to do things the world’s way? At the end of the article there is a wonderful teaching by Sarah Jakes.  It is a powerful reminder of how we need to keep our mind set on and keep it set.

No one can do this alone.  If you do not have a therapist or a counselor that you can go to, here is a link to Bedrock Ministries Bedrock Ministries.  Bedrock is a counseling ministry that will help walk you through this painful season.  They are a counseling ministry that can at least can advise and begin to point you in the right direction.  We would also love to be there for you.  Please feel free to contact us through our email at thruthewinters@gmail.com or comment below.

My Inner Fight

Are you at your breaking point yet?  Three days out of the week I make my way into the kitchen by 3:45 to start dinner, where I watch the tail end of Dr. Phil while doing so.  It’s here he reminds his guest that this was not his first rodeo, that no matter how flat you make a pancake it still has two sides and asking if he has the word “idiot” spelt on his forehead.  After he ends his show, I watch an hour’s worth of Judge Judy telling her litigants that she doesn’t give a rat’s behind about their clothes, their romantic life, or how they feel. She also makes sure that she tells them that they are a moron. Shortly after, the news comes on, and reality hits.

Another form of a pandemic has erupted as riots have ignited all over America.  Looting has caused small business owners to stand watch, the big named business needed to shut down in certain areas, and some police departments were being attacked.  After watching just, the first ten minutes of the news, I found myself fighting off fear, anxiety, depression, and despair.  Where was the hope when my small town turned into a civil rights protest demanding defunding of police and the removal of statues?

Yes, these are talks that need to happen but were these talks and the response in its purest form, or was it being fueled by 3 months of a mystery virus claiming the lives of thousands and forcing the whole world to stop?  We went from being in this together, to being completely divided.

Last week I started a hard conversation on the truth about stress and stressors.  Today I want to ask, “How does our body respond to stress?”  First, we have to ask, where does it all begin?  It all starts in the brain.  According to Tim Clinton in his book, Caring for People God’s Way, when stress starts, a chemical is released in the brain by three stress hormones to detect if the stress is a threat.  We start to get that fight or flight thinking (elevated pulse, increased blood pressure, and survival instincts).  Fight or flight is when your brain faces something that it detects as a threat and your brain decides if you are going to fight the threat or flee the scene.  Our nerve cells tighten and contract the muscles and sharpens the senses to prepare for action.

Unhealthy Stress Can Make Me Do What?

What are some behaviors that we exhibit when we are under an unhealthy amount of stress?  Last week, I talked about how acute stress, short periods of stress, is okay but when it prolongs it causes us to have an overactive adrenal system. God never meant for us to experience stress for such a long time.  I also shared that after months of quarantine and other distressing news, my family member Steve’s departure finally tipped the scale for me.  I found myself struggling daily and some of the things that I battled with may be similar to what you have experienced as well.

I found myself extremely tired.  I can’t explain the fatigue that was gripping me every day.  It wasn’t a kind of tired that I thought sleep would solve.  My brain was so exhausted from thinking and processing that when I would wake up in the morning the feeling like I didn’t even sleep, weighed me down.  But when you have four children, you can’t just stay in bed.  I would get up and do all that I could with a smile on my face, with tears in my eyes, I hoped no one would see the redness that clouded them.  When things would calm down in the day, I just wanted to take another nap.  But when it was nighttime, I found myself crying the most.  I didn’t want to be around people except for my family and lost my desire to do the normal things I would do.  I became more negative about different situations and before I knew it, I was snappy and irritable.

Here are some behavioral changes that may occur as well as some social issues that may follow stress.

1. Behavioral changes

o Withdrawal

o Avoidance

o Increase in substance abuse

o Change in eating habits

o Sleep issues

2. Social and emotional issues

O Fatigue

o  Irritability

o Feeling out of sorts

o Pessimistic thinking

o Depression,

o inability to switch on and off

Too Much Stress Turns Into…

If stress wasn’t bad enough, what else could happen?  When stress starts to surface, anxiety and fear is not that far behind.  What is the simple definition of anxiety? It is a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome. These feelings overtake us when we allow our thoughts to run away with us.  It is then that we start to worry about things that have not happened yet.  Tim Clinton said, “Anxiety reaction in the brain from fear or worrisome thinking can be caused by stress.  Every change in your mind (fear, worry, love, happiness) produces a corresponding change in the body (alarm or stress) and vice versa.”

There are different categories of fear (categories of anxiety?), here are four of them.

1. The first one is “worry anxiety.”  It is the most common kind and Phil 4:6 speaks to us on it.

 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

    2.  The second kind is “fear anxiety” and that is to be justified because there may be danger in front of us.  I witnessed a lot of fear anxiety as many elderly people changed their routines during the pandemic because they did not want to get ill. Grandparents stopped meeting with their grandkids.  The elderly stop socializing and became compulsive in their determination to clean and sanitize everything and anything.  These are perfect examples of fear anxiety.

3.  What is the number one health problem in women in the U.S.?  The answer to that question is also number three, “panic anxiety.”  This anxiety serves as a warning to us that something is not right. Those who struggle with panic can have an attack that could feel like a heart attack.  Many have been hospitalized by these attacks.

4. Lastly, “phobias” fall under the category of anxiety; 1 in 2 people have this.

So how do we treat stress, but even more so how do we treat anxiety? Let’s look at Isaiah 61:1

 The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me,

    because the Lord has anointed me

to bring good news to the poor;[a]

    he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,

to proclaim liberty to the captives,

    and the opening of the prison to those who are bound;

I think “heartbroken” was the best description of what I was experiencing.  God came to my rescue a week or so after Steve left.  I made the decision that I was going to start running to exercise.  While I was on my run/walk I heard the voice of God saying, “Put on worship music.”  As I walked and listened to the worship music, the presence of God blew over me.  I felt like HE was crying with me.  He was not questioning my faith or my loyalty to him.  He got it.  He knew where the tears had been flowing from even though I didn’t.  Tears fell but it was different this time, and I had the freedom to cry on this walk.  The words to the song started to restore my soul and mend my broken heart.

The very first thing we have to know is that God wants to bind up the brokenhearted.  He hurts with us and desires to heal our hearts from all the stress and fear we have undergone.  In these last 4-6 months, fear has chained itself to the ankles of so many all over the world but in this verse, God makes it clear that he wants to set us free from being imprisoned to panic, phobias, and anxiety.

But if God sets us free from our fears without facing them, we can return back into prison without even knowing it. When faced with a stressful, anxious, emotional, fears, a center of the brain sends a signal to alarm the other parts of the brain for a fear response.  So, there are four things we need to do to start breaking free.

1. Recognizing the fear and where it centers from. When we refuse to admit where we are, God cannot set us free from it and help us conquer it.
2. Changing your diet– Believe it or not, how we eat can play a big part in how we respond to things. For example, if we drink liquids with a lot of caffeine that can heighten our heart rates and get our minds racing, we will find ourselves anxious and jittery.  Also, when we eat a lot of junk food and/or sugary drinks, it can contribute to feeling tired, fatigued and irritable.
3. Exercising- After finding myself in an emotional roadblock due to stress and anxiety, I decided to start running and walking 4-5 days out of the week. Running and exercising saved me.  Running allowed me to get my energy out in a different way but it also allowed me time to myself.  Exercise can help release a different kind of chemical and allow a healthy kind of stress.
4. Deal with unhealthy fears (spiritually). This is the number one thing we must start doing.  In the middle of July, I realized that I had diminished in my devotion to God.  Since the church was closed, there was a discouragement even in my walk with God.  I knew I needed to get back to reading my word, journaling, and listening to worship music in a place of quiet.

No one can do this alone.  If you do not have a therapist or a counselor that you can go to, here is a link to Bedrock Ministries Bedrock Ministries.  Bedrock is a counseling ministry that will help walk you through this painful season.  They are a counseling ministry that can at least can advise and begin to point you in the right direction.  We would also love to be there for you.  Please feel free to contact us through our email at thruthewinters@gmail.com or comment below.

Stress Pandemic

What do we do when this world is stressing us out?  The middle of June of 2020 I found myself, like many of the people in this world, fighting off a flood of emotions from Covid19, protesting and vandalization.   My family honored a very close family friend, we’ll call Steve, as he departed for Bootcamp in the heart of this pandemic.  Even though I knew in my mind that he was going to be okay–he was safe, and that God was going to bring him back to us–his departure tipped the scale for me emotionally and caused me to stop for a moment as I realized that something was not right.

Of course the pandemic, and all that happened because of it, stressed out all of us.  Not everyone, however, handle stress in a healthy way.  Since March of 2020 there has been a rise in mental illness, depression and divorce.  It was said that there are increased reports of mental breakdowns, local violence and that domestic violence was at an all-time high.  I myself, was no longer working at full capacity at my job and was not able to do ministry in church.  I was forced to put everything on hold, released of all responsibility and still stressed out.  My world was turned upside down as, I’m sure, yours was.  I knew we were all in this together, but my brain was struggling to enjoy the much-needed pause.  I was stressed out and worried about our finances, my kid’s schooling, and how I was going to keep this mystery virus from coming into our home.

What does it really mean to be stressed and is it all bad?  Believe it or not, before Covid19 70% of Americans admitted to having stress in their life and 75% of all doctor visits are stress related 30% which are severe.  If this was the statistics before the pandemic, how much more have these numbers been elevated during it?  I’d like to first talk about how stress is defined and then how we can identify what the stressors are.  Stress is defined as a feeling of emotional or physical tension. It can come from any event or thought that makes you feel frustrated, angry, or nervous. Stress is your body’s reaction to a challenge or demand. It is a natural part of life enabling us to change, grow and produce good results in our lives.  It can also be seen as the over arousal of the adrenal system.

This definition makes it clear that stress is a normal human response on how we react to the everyday events of life.  Stress does not always have to be a bad thing.  For example kids need stress to push themselves in their schoolwork.  An athlete needs stress in order to train for a competition, just as a parent experiences the stresses to meet the needs of their children.  But you can also experience stress when an unexpected pandemic breaks out all over the world.

Oh Those Stressors?

Many of us think that stress is a bad thing but according to Tim Clinton he stated in his book, Caring For People God’s Way, that “God uses times of difficulty and adversity to stretch us and develop our character.”  Sometimes we think that those challenges are from the enemy or they are out to destroy us, but God allows difficulty to surface in our weaknesses, fears, insecurities and more.  When Clinton speaks of “character” what does he mean?  Well stress can play a part in forming (or destroying) your personality, morality, or the qualities that are used to distinguish us as individuals.  Yes, stress can build these things or destroy them, but it is how we handle what is thrown at us.  The stress we feel in these times with Covid19 and the racial wars all over the world can either build us up or it can destroy us.

So what are the stressors that can cause the stress?  Here is a list of some common main stressors:  finances, work, family, relationship, personal goals, emptiness, lack of fulfillment, irresponsible behavior on the part of others close to us, unrealistic expectations, negative attitudes, illness, trying to do too much, change, loss, a pandemic, racial wars and political confusion.

Let us tackle a few of these stressors.  Having relationships with others is a God given blessing.  Family and friends can motivate, support and provide many more benefits, but the truth is our relationships with others can cause a lot of stress.  I started off telling you about how Steve enlisted in the Marines.  He and I have a kind of a mom and son relationship and at the same time an older sister/younger brother relationship.  The moment he signed up to be a Marine he and I started bickering.  I had grown so attached to him in the last six years; we saw each other every single day, went on adventures, talked about almost anything and texted every day and, even though we were in quarantine, our families continued doing things together.  The idea of him leaving was causing so much stress on both of us (and others in the family) that we fought monthly, weekly and sometimes daily.

My response to him was often bitter or nasty and at times; I showed my stubbornness toward his feelings.  He knew that I hated the fact that he enlisted, but what made things even worse was the increasing number of confirmed cases and death during the pandemic and the racial wars.  I wasn’t comfortable with him leaving to bootcamp while our world was falling apart.  The stress of him leaving was surfacing a part of me that I have always been able to hide.  The truth was that I had fear, insecurities, a guarded behavior, and a lack of trusting God…especially with those I loved extremely.

When you are lucky enough to love someone and be loved in return, stress is an expected ingredient in several areas of your life.  For example, if a lack of financial security weighs on you, you may work harder in another area (such as in school or in your career), you will make a lot of personal goals to make yourself better for them and for yourself,  you may have unrealistic expectations and you may be wanting to do too much.

What do you do when your stressor is a worldwide pandemic followed by a racial and violent pandemic?  As much as relationships can be a painful, uncomfortable stressor—it is not the only kind of stress.  Illness and the fear of falling ill—followed by death during a pandemic—can surface a side of yourself that will bring a pressure you never expected.  I tried so hard to keep life as normal as possible but as masks, hand sanitizers and the devastating news grew, I found myself being lost in my emotions.  Life was changing not just here at home but all over the world. The overwhelming amount of death, the overcrowding of hospitals and the confusion of what to do to stop the spread of this virus, was wearing on me a little at a time, as it was everyone else.

Acute stress, according to, Caring For people God’s Way, is short-lived stress that keeps us alert to the protective response, equipping us to deal with challenges, unless they are too traumatizing.  That means the stress of a project, moving into a new home, an argument with a loved one, preparing for the birth of a child or a wedding, can cause acute stress but that is nothing to worry about.

So when does stress get dangerous?  Clinton says when any stress, good or bad, is prolonged or becomes chronic, excessive or intense and we aren’t able to recover, or remove ourselves from it, that there is a transition into distress (stress disease).  This causes adrenaline exhaustion and begins to erode the foundations of ones mental and physical health.  The mind and body are not equipped to handle the process of ongoing chronic stress.

This I Know

God created man to have acute stress because again He uses things like that to create character and personality.  Our design was never to have excessive stress even if it is for a good reason.  Sadly, many people all over the world are embarking on this as some have experienced prolonged stress when they cannot move forward from a stressor.  What do we do when a pandemic is going on 7 months, unemployment checks have stopped, politicians are fighting each other instead of fighting for their country, flames are still blazing from looters and our relationships are crumbling?  I remember when I was going on two months of random weeping.  I could not find joy in anything long enough to get the bad thoughts out of my head.  I wanted to scream so loud that I shattered my voice box while having an uncontrollable tantrum.

Weeks after Steve left, I remember sitting on the floor of my room and just wept bitterly.  I had no words to explain where my mind was to my family.  I was not just weeping for Steve but his absence prolonged where I was.  My daughter Rachel joined me on the floor and cried with me while my husband sat quietly, not knowing what to do to stop the tears.  I said, “I don’t know what to do.  I can’t get out of this.  I don’t know what is wrong with me.”  As I sat on my floor barely able to catch my breath, I knew I needed God.

God came to my rescue and, if you are experiencing your own form of stress, he will come to yours as well.  Join me next week as I explain how He came to my rescue and how He can do the same for you. I will also talk about how we respond to stress.  Maybe there are things you are doing or in your life that you never realized could be attributed to stress.  In the weeks to come we are going to talk about the behaviors we exhibit when we are seriously stressed.  When we are overly stressed anxiety, fear and stinking thinking starts. We will be addressing and talking about these things over weeks.

No one can do this alone.  If you do not have a therapist or a counselor that you can go to, here is a link to Bedrock Ministries Bedrock Ministries.  Bedrock is a counseling ministry that will help walk you through this painful season.  They are a counseling ministry that can at least can advise and begin to point you in the right direction.  We would also love to be there for you.  Please feel free to contact us through our email at thruthewinters@gmail.com or comment below.

Just Jump In

Does God still care about us during these uncertain times?  During this time, I am usually soaking up my the August weather at this time.  I am tickled when one of my kids will pass out because of the full days we have hiking, swimming or just enjoying each other in another state. There was one summer that I was pregnant with my second child Rachel. Pregnancy during the summer does not wear well on me. I was cranky and irritated so my best friend at the time made it her business to keep me active so we went to the pool. It was July and I was due in August and I could barely move. I lathered up my son, Joey, then two years old, with sunscreen and sent him off to play in the pool with his two buddies. My friend and I sat in the chairs on the side and watched them play. We were deep in a conversation when I noticed something was wrong. Joey slipped on something and wasn’t getting his footing. He was trying desperately to stand up but was unable to, with every attempt to stand up, he was panicking and falling in the water. He was easily drowning in shallow water and no one was seeing it. I jumped in the shallow pool and ran as fast as a nine-month pregnant mother could run. I ran past everyone who was totally oblivious of his struggle and snatched him up and held him in my arms as he coughed out the water in his lungs. Being a parent helps you see the love and the heart that God has for his children.

Where is God during these times when Corona is raging all over the nation and the whole world?  God never ever promises that those who believe in him wold not go through rough times.  There are believers and non-believers that are going through the same storms.  So if we are all in the same storm, why do I call on God?  God does not promise blue skies and rainbows but that he was going to dive in with us, walk this road with me. There is a difference when a storm rages for someone in a house verses someone who has no place to find refuge.  God has promised to be that refuge.

God Is Not A Spectator

How do I know he can be trusted?  I know that those things may not sound too reassuring to you or even comforting, but I remember when I was growing up felt so alone and hopeless that relationship with SOMEONE was what I needed for life to be new. God truly held up to his end of the bargain. God GOT IN my life of muck and mire. Every night when I laid my head on my pillow and soaked it with tears because of emotional pain I was going through, his presence was felt. He was at my bedside reassuring me that he had not left and that he loved me. In these times, many of us feel like our lives have been flipped upside down and we don’t know where to go.  With the loss and grief that is oppressing the world now, everyone is experiencing some form of emotional pain.  We need a present God, not a spectating God.

These moments with God strengthened my relationship with him, but it also showed me that my parents were not going to give me what I needed. My goal had been to please them and get them to see that I was different, but I was failing badly. It was my God that saw the changes and the good decisions I was trying to make. He became the love of my life. This was not the first time that God got into the heat of life with someone.

In the Bible, there is a really awesome story that adults seem to only tell children and teenagers. They cease to carry over this wonderful story of God’s power to the adult community. So let me give you a quick background. The following story can be found in Daniel chapter 3.  A king by the name of Nebuchadnezzar felt that he was a gift to humanity so he created a huge golden statue of himself for everyone to worship. After the statue was ready for unveiling he commanded that once the music started that everyone must bow down and worship the image. Every single human being bowed down except three men, Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego. They had a greater fear for God than of this prideful, arrogant human king. They refused to give this king a touch of worship that is only for God. When Nebuchadnezzar found out about the rebellion he called them to him. He demanded them to answers for their insolence and then told them that if they did not fall in line and bow to the image a second time that he would kill them. He went on to antagonize them by asking them what their God would do for them after he was done with them. He wanted to hear their thoughts on this, now, promise of sheer death. Look at theme’s answers,

“King Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you in this matter. ¹⁷ If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to deliver us from it, and he will deliver us^[c] from Your Majesty’s hand. ¹⁸ But even if he does not, we want you to know, Your Majesty, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up.” Daniel 3 16-18

These men knew that God can stop the pain that could befall them but even if he chose not to, he is still God.  We have to know that even though life does not happen the way we want, God is still God and he has not taken his eye off of us for one second.  So that’s why they said whatever God chose to do, to save them or to allow them to perish, they were fine with it (WHAT)! I don’t know if that would be my answer. I don’t know if you know the story, but the king was so furious that he sent all three men into a fiery furnace that was turned up seven times hotter then normal. It was so hot that the guard who brought them to the furnace died on the way. When you read this after reading different things that God has done, you would think that the death of the guard was the beginning of God doing something amazing. God doesn’t strike the king dead. He doesn’t blow out the fiery flames. What does he do?

“‘Look! I see four men walking around in the fire, unbound and unharmed, and the fourth looks like a son of the gods.'” Daniel 3:25 (NIV)

God got into the fire with them!! His presence protected those men so that they did not perish that day. Did he just show up or was he there the whole time? God was not going to allow them to face the fire by themselves even though they had each other. When my son was struggling in the pool, I did not ask someone near him to help him. I didn’t lean over the pool and reach out my hand to him. I did not ask my bestie to get him. I didn’t wait for the lifeguard to do something, even though that was why he was there. I got in the pool with him! I ran as fast as I could to be right by his side and rescue him. It was my job and no one else’s.

You Are Not Alone, God Is By Your Side

My friend, do you know that God refuses to just give you a hand in your pit to help you out and he doesn’t ask anyone else to help you. Jesus gets into the pit with you. so he can get you out. He walks by your side. He leads you out. He feels the heat with you as opposed to coaching you through it. Yes what are all facing is scary, yes it may seem like you aren’t getting your footing, yes it may seem lonely, but God will not leave your side. Do you need God to get in the pit with you? Are you struggling for your footing and need God to scoop you up? Do you feel alone and that God has not rescued you but you are drowning. My greatest desire is for you to ask God into the pit with you during these uncertain times. You can’t do it by yourself.

Do you have a testimony about God walking with you through “fire” in your life? Do you have a testimony in the making? We would love to hear from you in the comments!

A House Out of Control

How important is it to surround oneself with strong, determined people? There comes a time in everyone’s life when we choose to take a closer look at who is walking this journey with us. It’s one thing to have the support of people when things are great, but it’s another story when you are at the lowest time of your life, and there are friends and family who stick it out with you. Who stands by you when you can’t see God in rough times?

In our study of David, we will see him at his weakest–when his son Absalom has set out to destroy him–and his throne is in jeopardy. At the peak of his reign, David lost sight of himself and God; David rapes another man’s wife, got her pregnant and tried to cover it up by killing her husband. His season of unwise choices sent his household into chaos.

One of David’s son, Amnon rapes his sister, and David does nothing about it. Absalom, who would normally be next in line as king, is bitter at David’s lackadaisical approach to this atrocity. So, Absalom takes matters into his own hands and kills his brother Amnon forcing him to flee from the possible wrath of his father, the king. After a few years of being away, Absalom is absolved and allowed to come back. Little by little he gains the hearts of people and convinced a large part of the nation to turn their backs on King David.

Trying to Striking the King

For the safety of those David loved, and to keep from causing a war—that he may not win—, David packs up all his things and his other family members and left the kingdom. His remaining friends join him while his son quickly moves in power. Absalom, however, is not satisfied with just taking the throne; he wanted to destroy David and kill all those who were loyal to him. In 2 Samuel 17:3 Absalom wants advice on how to raid his father’s camp, so one man says,

“Let me choose twelve thousand men, and I will arise and pursue David tonight. I will come upon him while he is weary and discouraged and throw him into a panic, and all the people who are with him will flee. I will strike down only the king, and I will bring all the people back to you as a bride comes to her husband. You seek the life of only one man, and all the people will be at peace.”

I feel like this man spoke in the way Satan thinks. The devil thrives on our weaknesses and discouragement and he doesn’t play fair. He waits until you are at your lowest and most vulnerable state to come after you. This man wanted to go after David and strike him down all by himself. He used to be one of David’s closest advisors for several years, but now he wants to be the one to bring the final blow when David was at his weakest. He then goes on to admit it is David who keeps everyone together. This foolish idiot believes if he strikes down David, everyone else will fall in line; that he then will have the control over all the people.

Where last week we talked about how some come after you at your strongest and get defeated, there will be those who wait till we are at our lowest moment. But what they don’t realize is that our weakest moments are actually when we are the strongest.
“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” -2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Surround Yourself With Strength

So why do we find ourselves at times to be the target? For some, it may be because you are the one keeping others together. I’ve seen it a number of times. If you are the one that God is using to hold the moral, bring hope and strengthen others, the enemy knows that by attacking you, the heart and lifeline of others, then the whole group can fall.

David’s son hears this man’s advice and then goes to Hushai (another advisor), whom unbeknownst to Absalom, is a spy for David and relays to him what the first man said. Hushai responds in verses 8-10,
“You know that your father and his men are mighty men and that they are enraged, like a bear robbed of her cubs in the field. Besides, your father is expert in war; he will not spend the night with the people. Behold, even now he has hidden himself in one of the pits or in some other place. And as soon as some of the people fall at the first attack, whoever hears it will say, ‘There has been a slaughter among the people who follow Absalom.’ Then even the valiant man, whose heart is like the heart of a lion, will utterly melt with fear, for all Israel knows that your father is a mighty man and that those who are with him are valiant men.”

David is in a perilous place in his life where he finds himself, again, running for his life. There is something that remains consistent though about him. David made it a habit to surrounds himself with powerful people. Even though he was weak, he surrounded himself with strength. Also, though many turned their backs on David, those who stuck by him were determined men feared by all. Look at how Hushai described David and his men.

1. They were “mighty men.” He surrounded himself with extraordinary, powerful people who possessed might. There is no way for us to have people like that unless they have God inside of them. When you look around are you allowing extraordinary people to walk this walk with you or are you around people who are encouraging you to be mediocre?

2. They were enraged– Think about it, these men were the ones on the run. They weren’t running because they were afraid, the men were running because they were following their leader. Hushai said that their rage was like a bear robbed of her cubs in the field. I think that is the worst kind of madness ever. A bear will maul you just for being in the vicinity of her babies, but they are compared to a mother bear who was ROBBED of her cubs! That means that there is no challenge Absalom could place before them that would keep them from getting back what was stolen!

So even though they may be outnumbered, their rage is so escalated that nothing would keep them from ripping you to shreds. We need to be around people who refuse to live in fear no matter how dangerous the challenge.
“For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.”
-2 Timothy 1:7

Those you surround yourself with should bring fear to the enemy. At some point, we must understand that if we truly realized who we were and comprehended the power we really possess, then we would be more inclined to cause Satan to think twice before he rose up against us. We need to live our lives where we have Satan on the run, dodging us and putting up barricades to keep US out, not the other way around. Add to that, friends who will stay the course with you and seek God for wisdom and protection as you do. Ooooooooohhhhhhhhh MAN!!!

3. Lastly, Hushia says that David is a mighty man and those who are with him are valiant men. These powerful, God-fearing men attached themselves to David because he kept himself strong and under the Lord. Some of the reasons we don’t defeat our enemy is because we have hitched our ride to people who are weaker, less motivated, unfocused, fearful, doubtful, and distracted partners. There is nothing wrong with helping one who is weak to become strong, but how can you look to the one who is weaker to be the one who can lift you up when you are down?

“Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?”
-2 Corinthians 6:14

Many people use this scripture for couples—where ones believe’s in God and the other doesn’t—that is partially the case but overall this is about locking yourself with someone who doesn’t believe as you do or someone who is living in darkness while you are in the light.

Weekly Challenge:

Are you surrounded by strength? Take an inventory of those you have around you during your vulnerable moment.  Would you call them mighty, would they call you mighty? In this upcoming weak, see who was around you when you were vulnerable, see who is around you now. be honest about the changes that you may need to change.

Follow us on Facebook and Instagram @throughthewinters.com.

Also, our newest book is out!!

We have worked really hard to talk about the war that Christians are in. We are meant to win every battle set before us but there are many times we get in our way.  What are some things we need to learn in order to never lose another spiritual battle again?  Buy our Book on Amazon to find out.

 The Keys to Victory

If God had the key to keeping you from losing another battle against your adversary, would you want it? Think about it, never losing another struggle, always overcoming, always getting one over on your enemy. In the world that we live in, battling is a part of growth. How awesome would it be never to have another obstacle, challenge or conflicts one would question if you are even alive. Growing requires stress, work, and pain. Likewise, there is no victory without having to experience some form of battle or war. So, now the question is, does having to go through a struggle or pain cause us to be afraid of facing our challenges. In the next two weeks, we will examine the famous King David. Other than Jesus, I believe David is the most spoken about man in the Bible. He is the most renowned for things, like killing the 9-foot tall giant with a pebble and a rubber band (to his most wicked sins) like raping a woman while her husband was risking his life for his king. In the life of David, there is so much we can glean from his story.

His failures and successes, friendships and loves, passions, and convictions. David was thirty years old when he finally sits on the throne as king. The Philistine nation remained as a constant thorn to the side of the Israelites. They were powerful and surrounded the borders of Israel at nearly every corner. Now, most people remember that David defeated the giant Goliath in 1 Samuel 17. Goliath was one of the mightiest warriors of the Philistine nation. Fewer people, however, are aware of the time when David and his army of 600 men lived with the Philistines to get away from King Saul in 1 Samuel 27. For a period, David lived amongst his countries enemy because Saul was enraged to kill David in fear that David would take his throne. If you recall, the Philistines were the main villains from Samson in the book of Judges. For over 40 years, Israel had been fighting this enemy, and David found it favorable to live with them instead of facing Saul. In that time, David became so close to their leader, King Achish; that he soon became Achish’s bodyguard. He gained the trust of this king so much that when the Philistines rose up again to do battle against the Israelites in 1 Samuel 29, David was on the side of the countries enemy. The King of the Philistines saw David as an asset, but the men in the army thought it unwise to have him fighting along with them.

When Old Friends Come Knocking

The relationship with that king showed what kind of man David was. How could he defeat this king’s mightiest warrior Goliath, destroy the other members of his army, (At 16 years of age) and then have enough guts to go into this nation for refuge when things were heating up against him in Israel? Let’s look and see how this goes on when David is finally crowned king of Israel.

“When the Philistines heard that David had been anointed the king over Israel, all the Philistines went up to search for David. But David heard of it and went down to the stronghold. Now the Philistines had come and spread out in the Valley of Rephaim. And David inquired of the Lord, ‘Shall I go up against the Philistines? Will you give them into my hand?’ And the Lord said to David, ‘Go up, for I will certainly give the Philistines into your hand.’ And David came to Baal-perazim, and David defeated them there. And he said, ‘The Lord has broken through my enemies before me like a breaking flood.’” -2 Samuel 5 vs. 17-20

Verses 17 tells us that the Philistines went to search for David. It does not say they went to war against him, however; it was clear that their intentions were not good. David had a reputation for destroying just about anyone he faced on the battlefield. His mindset was one of a winner. But even with all his victories, David did something you don’t see many soldiers doing, he went straight to God (verse 19). He had defeated the Philistines in the past, and he knew their fighting style and methods. Why go to God? Even if the whole nation of the Philistines came knocking at his door like a group of drunken frat boys, David needed to follow the leading of the Lord. He knew that the partnership was over and that this was going to be a war. He also knew though that if God was not with him, he was not going to win. In verse 19, God gives him the thumbs up and reassures David that he will be with him. David and his armies go on to defeat the Philistines, and as he describes it in verse 20, it was a clean and swift victory. So after such an unexpected defeat, the Philistines went back and never bothered David again. HAHA, yeah right!!! The Philistines licked their wounds, took out their crayons and went back to the drawing board.

“And the Philistines came up yet again and spread out in the Valley of Rephaim. And when David inquired of the Lord, he said, ‘You shall not go up; go around to their rear, and come against them opposite the balsam trees. And when you hear the sound of marching in the tops of the balsam trees, then rouse yourself, for then the Lord has gone out before you to strike down the army of the Philistines.’ And David did as the Lord commanded him, and struck down the Philistines from Geba to Gezer.” -2 Samuel 5:22-25

The Philistines came after David again, and he did what he does best, he asked God a second time what he should do. Verses 23, 24 say that God did NOT want David to go after them directly this time. God gave him entirely different orders because God was going to send his army to fight with David this time around. David did as the Lord told him.

This Tale is Soldier 101.

How does this story give us the key points to never lose a battle against your enemies?

First, never put your guard down. The Philistines–upon hearing that David was anointed king– dispatched men to look for him out. Whether it was fear or stupidity, it was clear they did not respect the position and wanted Israel at their mercy. Listen, don’t ever think that your prosperity will keep you safe from Satan’s attacks. If anything, it may make you more of the target. He loves coming after people in leadership or high places because, the higher the position, the more fatal the fall.

Second, Satan will use old “frienemies.” David found refuge with his enemy when a more significant enemy arose. When the more substantial threat was no more, those he once sought shelter with, now preyed on him. Trading one evil for another is still messing with evil, and there are times when we trade one unhealthy habit for another. Perhaps it’s an old habit that you turned to when things were hard, and now the desire is coming back up. Whatever shape it comes in, know that Satan wants to bring you down, and he’ll use anything.

Third, consult God before fighting. Even if the answer appears obvious, seek the will of your Commanding Officer (God) before heading into a fight or battle. Don’t assume that you know what God wants. The Lord has given us scripture, and in it are basic instruction on how we are to conduct our selves. What is not written in there are the obstacles, choices, and confrontations that require us to seek his direction. It requires a unique discipline to restrain one’s self to follow instruction. It is a sign of spiritual growth when we do it; God knows the best way to destroy your enemy. If you always want to overcome the enemy and never lose another battle ever again, then seek after the one who is all-knowing.

Fourth, sometimes the enemy attacks the same way to make you think you never beat him. Both times that the Philistines came up against David they used the same tactic. Now I’m not going to assume I know what the enemy is thinking, but I do know we face battles that cause us to question a previous victory. We think to ourselves, If I beat this before, why am I being tested by it now? For example: If I won my battle with un-forgiveness then why am still upset? If I defeated my addiction to alcohol then why do I have cravings? If I’m over that relationship why am I feeling hurt? One of the reasons why Satan comes at us in this way is to make us believe that we never had the victory in the first place. It is a mind game, and if we enter on the battlefield with even an ounce of defeat, he is already one step closer to winning the battle.

Lastly, don’t assume you know what to do. David was on the same battlefield, fighting the same enemy. Most people would believe that God’s orders would have been the same, but the second time God gave him new orders. New battles may look like previous ones, but they may require different tactics. In my life, I have observed that God is not in the business of making us fight the same fight over and over again. In some cases, things may appear the same, but it is a different lesson and/or a test to see if we learned from the previous experience. I believe many people find themselves struggling with the same issues because they use the same tactic they used once before not realizing that they are not eliminating the problem but are temporarily subduing it. The bottom line is this; If we would go to God every time we face something that requires us a course of action beyond what is written in scripture, we will see life better filled with victories.

Weekly Challenge:

Look at some previous battles you’ve had. Did you put your guard down? Or maybe you got involved with some people that are trying to get back into your life, are you having a hard time getting rid of them? Perhaps you didn’t consult God for help. It could also be that you defeated the enemy, but your reoccurring battle makes you think you ever victorious. It might also be that you lost other battles because you thought you knew it all. Take this time to think about it and see how you can fight better the next time. Feel free to comment below or email us on if you need additional help. Follow us on Facebook or Instagram @throughthewinters.com.

Also, our newest book is out!!

We have worked really hard to talk about the war that Christians are in. We are meant to win every battle set before us but there are many times we get in our way.  What are some things we need to learn in order to never lose another spiritual battle again?  Buy our Book on Amazon to find out.

When Enough is Enough

Have you ever gotten to a point where you’re just tired of being pooped on? One thing after another comes knocking at the door and it never stops; the challenges keep coming. Has there ever come a time when you finally said enough is enough!!  Well at a very young age I found myself fed up. I was about 9 years old, maybe 10, when a band of boys in my school started bullying me regularly. They made fun of everything that I wore and everything I said, mercilessly. They tripped me, pushed me and cursed at me regularly. I had my moments when I was backed up in a corner and was forced to fight the leader of the group. I never really beat him enough for him to leave me alone, just enough for the attack to be over. He just kept coming back. It was a few years of me fighting this kid until one day I had had enough.

Most 5th graders were excited for school to end so they can go home but that was not the case for me.  It was 3 pm and everyone was excited to pack up and get on line for dismissal. I was about to begin my 10-minute walk to my father’s job when the class bully, and his friends, came behind me throwing insult after insult. I stopped near the swings to face my attackers. For years, I had been the target of his antagonizing.  I did what I could to hold my own.  Today, their attacks and insults had gone on long enough. This was the day when I was going to stop running.

What makes you stop running from something you once feared? Would you call yourself a fighter or a fleer? As a child, fear was the spirit that dominated my home. You never really knew what mood to expect with my dad. He battled with so much anger that he created a daughter who mirrored the same within herself. Anger consumed me and with no proper outlet; when I did find a release, my anger it was out of control.  So, some cases caused me to fight. It wasn’t until the fighter in me came out that I realized who I had slowly become.  Did I hate abuse? Absolutely! Did I hate the rage that was consuming me? No doubt, I did! But something about those moments I experienced with my father developed, within me, a girl who would never run from a fight. Even if I knew I was going to lose, I didn’t back away. I couldn’t fight my dad, but there was no way I’d let anyone else control or abuse me.

Put Up or Shut Up

The boys came up from behind me and started mouthing off as usual. For some reason, when I stopped at the swings  in the play ground, I was so angry that I could not speak. They took my silence as weakness. The leader of the group walked up to me and slapped me across the face–knocking my new pink tinted glasses off my face. The glasses fell into a ditch that was to the side of the swings. The other boys laughed as tears filled my face. I eyed them all down and then glanced at my glasses on the side. “What are you going to do?”, the leader taunted. I didn’t say anything, he scoffed at me and then motioned for his guys to follow him as he walked away in the opposite direction of my father’s job.

I went into the ditch, picked up my glasses, put them in my book bag with the thought, “How much longer am I going to let this keep going? I need this to stop. I’m done!” I was tired of fighting just enough to be left alone for the day. This needed to end, and I wanted it to end now!  Have you ever asked yourself how much longer are you going to keep letting things happen to you?  Have you gotten to the point where you are tired of fighting just enough to be left alone for the day?

So, I walked towards the boys with no plan or idea of how this was going to play out. I didn’t care how many of them there were; I just knew that they were not going to bully me anymore. One of them noticed I was approaching and told the leader. He turned around and said, “Oh you want more?” I still couldn’t get any words to come out of my mouth, but I began to cry harder. No sound came from my mouth, yet my eyes were filling with tears of anger, rage, frustration, and fear; fear that this will be how I had to live my life day after day, fist after fist.

I stood there, hands clenched, face full of tears and breathing heavy. One of the boys, upon seeing me like this, suggested to the leader that he leave me alone. He then pointed out that my father had a reputation for being crazy so they didn’t want to mess with me too much. The bully did not listen.  Instead, he continued to taunt me. Taking off his book bag, he continued to run his mouth. He took a step toward me and I jumped on him like a cheetah on a rabbit. The other boys jumped back surprised as I placed all my weight on the bully pinning him on a parked car nearby. Then my mouth opened. With each swing of my fist, I screamed into this boys face and released the rage that had been building up in me.
A motorist drove up to our brawl and scolded…HIM… for fighting a girl. The driver told all four of us to get out of there and go home. The humiliated bully picked up his stuff and started on his way. This was the time that I should have walked the other way to go to my father’s job, however, I was not done. I wanted this boy to never mess with me again.  But didn’t feel that I had put enough fear in him that he would not come back.   I followed the boys with determination in my heart. It would be over when I felt like this was done. I followed behind the boys and the leader.  “What are you doing?” He asked.  It was in my eyes that I was now preying on him like he preyed on me. I wanted him to know what it felt like to be stalked and I wanted him to be afraid.

Eventually, he stopped walking and turned to confront me. The moment he turned to me, I attacked him. He was going to learn that I was not going to be afraid anymore and he did. That day was the last altercation he and I ever had with each other.

I am not here to push physical altercation, but I tell you that story to make this point. We have an enemy who is not of flesh and blood but of spirit. This enemy wants us to grow weary and weak. He throws trials and tribulations that make us want to give up. Like the bully, we must face the enemy and insults.  There has to come to a point when we stop and confront him. God has equipped us with His word, a weapon that gives us the ability to stomp and trample on our enemy. That weapon is of no use though if we don’t use it and use it well.

Why Are You Fighting?

It wasn’t until over a year or so later that that same bully tried to raise his head at me again but I shut him down real quick. I reminded him of the pounding I gave him in front of his friends and, said with confidence, that I could easily do it again.  With God by our side, how much more confident should you and I be when the enemy tries to rise up against us? Jesus died and resurrected, defeating the enemy for us.  We need to put the enemy on notice that even if he does attempt to come at us again, he will regret that moment; we have the victory.  God has made us fighters but are we fighting a good fight or fighting just enough to get by? If it’s just enough to get by, trust me, eventually you will grow tired of fighting and that’s when you will be the most vulnerable to fall.
In 1 Sam 17, David in the Bible was a perfect example of this. When Goliath kept bullying the Israelites for 40 days and the soldiers hid for fear of defeat, everything changed when David showed up on the battlefield. He was not going to allow the enemy to live one more day spewing out insults and mindless threats. David was an Israelite who was appalled that the other soldiers ran from the challenge of fighting Goliath.  When it came for him to face the giant, David didn’t put on the normal armor or throw out mindless threats; he took 5 stones and a slingshot and didn’t run FROM the battle. 1 Samuel 17:48 says that he ran quickly TOWARDS the battle. When that 16-year-old swung his slingshot, causing the giant to fall down in defeat; David conquered the bully. But God doesn’t call us to be conquerors. That’s right!! According to Romans 8:37, we learn that

“We are MORE than conquerors through Him who loves us.”

That means that we don’t just win, we dominate because of Christ’s love for us! We defeat the enemy so bad that he thinks twice before coming back again. David stunned Goliath, but he was more than a conqueror when he cut the head of that 9 foot giant with his own sword.

Weekly Challenge:

How do we become such a fighter? How do becomes such a threat that the enemy is scared to come against us? In the month of April, we will be talking about ways that we can become the soldier God has called us to be.  Join us this month to see what God says about the best way to overcome our enemy.

Follow us on Facebook and Instagram @throughthewinters.com.  Leave a comment below or email us for additional help.  Also, our newest book is out!!

We have worked really hard to talk about the war that Christians are in. We are meant to win every battle set before us but there are many times we get in our way.  What are some things we need to learn in order to never lose another spiritual battle again?  Buy our Book on Amazon to find out.

What Could that Weapon Be?

It was about thirteen years ago when Sam and I were getting ourselves ready for our weekly devotion… We had started listening to a series by a famous preacher. My husband heard it before and was so excited for me to hear it as well. In this message this preacher would revealed what he thought was the weapon Satan feared the most. Before really listening to the message, it intrigued both of us. We threw out ideas of what the weapon could be. Was it prayer? Definitely prayer because Satan had to be afraid of that moment we got on our knees and connected to the Father. Or maybe it was going to church. It had to be that because when I go to church I meet other Christians and we sharpen each other and encourage one another in the faith and I am more energized for my week. Oh man, it had to be reading your Bible. Reading your Bible had to be what Satan fears because we then know God’s promises and we become confident in Satan’s demise. Hmmm, we thought. Maybe it was worship. That was definitely it. Worship had to be what Satan feared the most because when I turn on that music and really lock my emotions in with God, Satan has to be afraid of what happens next.

For the next hour and a half my husband and I listened to the preacher bring up different possibilities but we were blown away at the answer. The simplicity was almost a letdown because the anticipation of the answer was thought-provoking. The weapon Satan fears the most, in the opinion of that preacher, and also by this blogger, is not prayer, not worship, not reading your Bible and it’s not even church attendance. These things are a threat and they do bring damage but they must be partnered with something else for the enemy to fear it as a weapon.

How Is That A Weapon!!!??

Well here it is… the weapon Satan fears the most is our obedience! What do you think when you read that? Well, what I thought when I heard that was shock, denial and then doubt. How in the world could me simply obeying God be a WEAPON? Let me explain how this preacher was so on point that he changed my life.

When I came to Christ I was still a young girl who wanted to run my own life. You see me walking with God was MY choice. I did not see it as a surrendering of my will but actually an agreement to allow God to get involved. I was deep into sexual addiction and I was not fighting it one bit. I still flew off the handle at the drop of a hat and I was struggling with many other things. I was still living my life as if I was in charge but with the Bible as my guide. As I got older and grew in Christ I still felt like I was calling the shots more. I was making decisions and wanting God’s stamp of approval instead of waiting for him to lead and guide. I was no threat to the enemy this way.

I understood obedience at the age of 17yrs old two weeks after arriving at Zion Bible Institute, now North Point Bible College. Sam and I had been dating for three months before I left for school. For most people that I came across, I was making the biggest mistake by being in a long distance relationship with someone I had only been with for such a small amount of time. Both of our hearts were breaking as my departure time was coming closer. I thought of not going to Zion but I knew God had called me there… or did I? I tried to talk myself out of this torture because I knew that my chances of losing him was so great it was more like I was waiting for the inevitable. I was waiting for the attraction to die and one of us to call it quits. I was right on the edge of calling my mother and going back home just at the thought of this happening. My mother was not going to fight with me because she didn’t want me there anyway.

I was crying every single day for weeks concerning Sam. He was my first real boyfriend and I just didn’t want to lose him. I begged God to show me if this was my husband or not. If this was going to be my husband then I would gladly do what God wanted with the reassurance that my fate was sealed with him. Unfortunately, God did not do that. God spoke to me and told me that I needed to “let Sam go.” I thought my heart ripped in pieces. How in the world could I do that? God clarified that I was asked me to “let him go” not “give him up.” He went on to say that if I held on to him I would lose him but if I let him go I would get him back. He told me to take one day out of the week to pray and focus on His will while I was in school. I was not to return home but stay put and trust him.

Obedience: So Simple It’s Difficult

Satan had a plan for me. He wanted me to continue to call the shots, but this day I hung up my crown as queen of my life and trusted God as my new King. Obedience was the only way I was going to escape the traps that Satan set before me. Yes, I could attend church, but if I never obeyed the words that were being preached then what good was it? Oh I read my Bible, especially since it was required. But if I never did anything that I read then how effective would reading God’s promises be? Oh and worship, I loved worship…still do! If I threw myself into a few minutes of singing music but didn’t show any change, then that moment was just a time of singing meaningless mantras to make me feel better. And yes prayer is no different. I could connect with God but if his answers to my issues require my cooperation and I refuse to obey then what use is prayer against my enemy?

You need to understand that a healthy marriage was not in my destiny. I was suppose to stay in dysfunction and chaos. I needed to fight back and my only way to do so was to obey the Lord. Every single act of obedience was a kick in the enemies teeth. When I made obedience my weapon, Satan then feared my attendance in church, my worship times, my devotions with God and, most of all, my prayers. August 1, 2020 my husband and celebrated  22 years of marriage. I give all the glory to God for leading me the right way even when it didn’t make sense.

What do you think about obedience being a weapon? Do you think there is more to it? Do you think it’s too simple? What makes obeying God easier said than done? Take this time to be honest with yourself about things you know you shouldn’t have done but did anyway. We would love to hear your thoughts in the comments below!

The Corona Virus has turned all of our lives upside down all over the world, including ours. It has been a challenge to continue to write, do speaking engagements, and even podcasts are limited. We are going to be back better than ever but for now, it would be unrealistic to keep going with the new demands on life. Thank you for your support. We are prayering for you all. If you are still in need of someone to talk to because of the stress of life, please feel free to contact us at thruthewinters@gmail.com. We love you!!

We would like to apologize for the delayed article.  This one was suppose to be posted a week ago but because of the outbreak of the coronavirus in our area, there has been some slow down.  Thank you for understanding.

The Struggle is Real

What are some of the struggles one goes through when battling with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder?  Sandra was settling down for bed when her husband came in; damp from his nightly shower.  In a time when Sandra should be getting ready to rest and put all of her troubles to bed, her night was just beginning.  David was a loving husband that just finished almost twenty years in the Marines and the Army.  Serving as a soldier in combat–and his times in the military–has taken a major toll on his body, but mostly on his mind.  David was considered a weapon because of his training and his ability. After leaving the Army, he found making new relationships hard, tedious, and meaningless.  Not unless you were once in the military, David found it hard to relate and be understood by others in his community, his job, and his church.  His family became his everything and nothing meant more to him than staying connected to them but that continued to be challenging.

What was it like living with him?  Despite what others saw in him, Sandra loved her husband’s passion, love, boisterous laugh and desires to stay connected.  His Post Traumatic Stress Disorder had caused Sandra to have fear in times when she should feel relaxed; and night time were one of those times.  They laid down and kissed each other good night and went to sleep.  That night she was not feeling well and quietly went to the bathroom.  After a few minutes she returned to her bed feeling a bit weak and made some noise as she was settling back in bed.  David was instantly startled and quickly grabbed her by the throat, slammed her against the wall and was inches away from connecting his fist to her delicate jaw.  Sandra struggled to say “It’s me, David!  David, you’re hurting me.”  Just before she started to pass out from her airways being squeezed, her calling his name woke him from his trance.  He looked into his wife’s eyes, which were full of tears.  His grip loosened and he put his arms down once he came out completely.  He hugged her and apologized to her again and again with kisses of love.  Sweat formed on his face as he had to admit that he had lost it again.

David is amongst many in the world who are struggling with PTSD because they survived some kind of trauma like abuse, violence, crisis, and tragedy.  Many soldiers, like David, are plagued with this from seeing combat, while others experience it from natural tragedy, or being violated. The sad thing is many survivors of these tragedies don’t feel like survivors because the incident haunts them and 20% of them are face thoughts of suicide.

What Are Some Ways We React to PTSD

If you are struggling with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder I want you to know that I too went through PTSD in my adult years.  It was so hard at times and it is hard for many to understand unless you have been through it.  For those of you who have gone through some strong trauma, I would like you to think through this article; and be honest, are you struggling with suicide?  Does suicide come to your mind when you feel like this is never going to end?  The images, the dreams, the sounds, the flashbacks won’t leave you alone so you think it would just be better to end it all.  I know that these feelings may lead you to a path of hopelessness because you just don’t see living life like this and depression starts to settle in.

How do you deal with being whisked back into that traumatic moment against your wishes? Sadly, many drown their hurt in addictive substances like alcohol and drugs, but anything that we depend on for escape from these moments is bad.  We don’t have to only rely on those things but maybe it is overworking, or overeating?  I first want to say I am sorry because I know that many probably have their thoughts on, what they define as, destructive behavior but they don’t understand that you don’t want to be like this. You are trying to do whatever you can to just make it through, but your decisions are making living worse.

Sadly, this can cause a person to have anxiety disorders where fear overtakes them at the worst time.  We want to avoid the idea of having to relive certain memories so when we think that we are about to face our nightmare, anxiety attacks us.  It is also not uncommon for us to experience panic attacks as well.  This can be so exhausting because these attacks can have dizziness, accelerated heart rates, sweating, shortness of breath and serious chest pains.  The chest pains can be so bad that you could think that you are having a heart attack.

Where Do We Run To

Where do we go when we are feeling this way?  Well, first we have to understand that there are people in the Bible that went through anxiety, fear, maybe even panic.  When we understand that there are people in the Bible who hurt as we hurt in this way than we can feel confident that God is not judging us harshly.

Psalms 40 11-13

Do not withhold your mercy from me, Lord;

may your love and faithfulness always protect me.

For troubles without number surround me;

my sins have overtaken me, and I cannot see.

They are more than the hairs of my head,

and my heart fails within me.

Be pleased to save me, Lord;

come quickly, Lord, to help me.

In these verses, we see that the author feels like trouble is surrounding them.  Isn’t that what it can feel like when we are feeling like our world is closing in around us?  Then as we continue to read the author says that there was more trouble than the hair on his head.  Sometimes when we have PTSD it spills into every area of our lives.  Before we know it, it is hurting our job, our family issues, our friendships, and even our view of God.  At times we may just feel like we are trying to keep our head above water.

Unfortunately, David and Sandra did not last too much longer like this.  Due to his fear and his anxiety he was the one who left.  Sandra loved him but his anger and his instability caused him to feel it was better to end the marriage.  After leaving the marriage he was able to find a very powerful support system of people that was able to slowly show him that he needed counseling. Those around him saw that he was blacking out at times, and having panic attacks.  He was placing himself in danger unexpectedly and it became clear he couldn’t even work.  Despite his resistance, he knew that he needed therapy and got into professional counseling.  Today healing is slow and he is still battling with somethings but every day is baby steps.

Next week I am going to talk about the things we can use to treat this disorder but I have to first say that we all need help.  We can never do anything alone.  There are times when we have to admit to ourselves that we are not capable of going on this way.  I want to encourage you to reach out to a professional therapist or counselor.  It may be embarrassing to talk about it, but that’s where step one starts…talking about it.  We will have a link to Bedrock Ministries where you can get professional help.

Always remember, God loves you and He will help you find the strength you need to keep moving on.  You will beat this and you will find peace. No one can do this alone.  If you do not have a therapist or a counselor that you can go to, here is a link to Bedrock Ministries Bedrock Ministries.  Bedrock is a counseling ministry that will help walk you through this painful season.  They are a counseling ministry that can at least can advise and begin to point you in the right direction.  We would also love to be there for you.  Please feel free to contact us through our email at thruthewinters@gmail.com or comment below.  Also if you would like to hear more about my testimony read my book, “The Threshing: A Weapon Forged by Fire.” Sign up here to read the first three chapters for free!  You can also buy the full book on Amazon!.  We would also love to hear from you.  You can email us at thruthewinters@gmail.com or you can comment below.

A Stay-At-Home Mom With PTSD

What are some symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder?  As a stay-at-home mom of two small children I did everything I could to keep a clean home many years ago.  I wasn’t disciplined enough to have OCD (joking) but I did have a daily routine and if anything interrupted that it caused me anxiety if I didn’t get things done.  When Sam and I moved into our second home, I found myself more on edge.  I would snap a lot quicker and almost picked fights with him.  I remember one day in particular where I spent all day working hard cleaning but wasn’t finished when I heard my husband’s keys on the doorknob.  I became anxious and I quickly started making a checklist in my head of what I didn’t do and what I was missing.  I remember him coming in and literally standing at attention when I saw that Joey (my son) was in dirty clothes and there was a diaper on the floor.  I ran quickly to grab the diaper, organize the futon cushions and apologize for Joey’s clothes.  As I started explaining why Joey was a mess, Sam dismissed it—because he didn’t really care—and proceeded to go into the bedroom to lay down from a hard day’s work.  I became agitated, annoyed and short with him as my heart was racing and my anxiety was building.  

Shortly after he asked me a question, I snapped at him—with no understanding on my part of why.  I started thinking how he didn’t comprehend the work I went through; he took me for granted—and on and on.  What was wrong?  Why was I mentally attacking him?  The answer to this question would not be answered until much later.  

Since those moments Sam and I have moved again and believe it or not, the change impacted me tremendously.  Our marriage grew stronger in time as we learned how to work together and also deal with our own personal issues.  One major issue I had to deal with was the sound of his keys on the doorknob.  Let me explain…  

As a child I had a lot of responsibilities.  At the age of 7 years old my mother went back to work and I was forced to watch my newborn baby brother very early each morning while my father was sleeping before I was to get up for school.  After school, I was forced to continue taking care of him till my mother came home from work.  From the time he was born I took care of him—at as young as eight-years-old, I was left at home by myself to clean the house, watch and take care of him, do my homework and help him with his homework (when he got older).  When my father came home I knew it was him because his keys would jingle on the brass metal doorknob.  I would run to my room, hear his footsteps and see his shadow go by my room.  Then I waited for him to go into the kitchen and call for me if something was wrong.  Many days I sat in my room on my bed holding my breath and trying to silence my heartbeat as I was waiting for him to call my name.  A majority of those times were followed by my name being called and I would be interrogated about what I did since I came home and if the answer did not suffice I was threatened and/or an unnecessarily given a beating.  

One does not experience PTSD until the trauma that was inflicted is over. It is “Post Traumatic”, and the “Stressful” reaction to what happened continues in the victims mind and subconscious.  PTSD is only diagnosed when the individual is no longer in the traumatic environment.  One could be completely safe and everything is fine but they may still act and even feel like the danger is still around.  

When my husband would come through the door, I was always taken back to being that scared little girl waiting for my interrogation and some explosive behavior from my father.  My heart would start racing and I would listen for my husband to call my name or question why something was out of place.  I would be apologetic, and even scared if one of the kids were dirty when he came home.  Flashbacks of the beatings and threats I received as a child flooded over me.  My stomach would start to hurt, and I would be agitated and became extremely anxious.  

Now please know that in the twenty-one years of my marriage, my husband has NEVER raised his voice to me.  He has spoken to me firmly in arguments, but never ever yelled at me.  He has never ever put his hands on me in an aggressive way, and when we have had conflicts, I never felt that he would actually hurt me.  However, through no provocation of on his part, I have felt in random moments all reason and logic go right out the door and they are replaced with fearful flashbacks and memories.  

What Happens When We Don’t Turn Off

What are some things that can cause PTSD?  One of the most know groups of people who go through this disorder are soldiers and abuse victims.  As stated last week there is a part of our brain that God created that switches on when they are in a dangerous situation.  It is meant for protection but what happens to us when the switch comes on, on its own and we don’t know how to turn it off?  When a soldier is in combat or a victim is being beaten or mistreated, the brain turns to reacting so they can survive.  A person with PTSD can have an “episode” from a reaction to a sound, smell and/or touch.  It has been diagnosed in people who have faced neglect, experienced some form of violence, gone through a natural disaster like an earthquake, tornado or hurricane, and the list goes on.    

There are 4 symptoms of PTSD that I want to talk about.  These are not the only symptoms of course, but these 4 can be pretty noticeable if someone you know has suffered past trauma and you’re wondering if they now struggle with PTSD.    

1. The first one isconstantly re-experiencing the trauma.  Even though the trauma could be over, a victim relives it through memories that could be triggered by anything, as said before, sounds, smell or touch.  I remember the song that was playing when I was being molested.  For several years when the song would come on in places like the bowling alley, supermarket or in the mall, it triggered something in me and I would start crying.  I’d run out of the place because the memories of those experiences were connected in my mind to that song.  I remembered everything as if I was going through it all over again. 

Some re-experience their trauma through dreams, and flashbacks. These become constant reminders of what once was and the individual now fears being in public for fear of having a flashback, or sleeping again because they are worried that they will dream the traumatic event again.  The victims days could be ruined and affect their moods and relations with others.    

2. A second symptom could be consistently in defense mode.  The victim is always looking over their shoulder, jumpy, can’t stay focused because they are easily distracted and may seem on edge.  My husband never really knew what was going to set me off.  It could have been a question or a simple statement, depending where my head was that day my responses could have been erratic.  Many victims may not know why they respond the way they do.  They will build up walls against others even if they have proven that they are not like the offenders.   
3. At times one’s body has not mentally or emotionally healed from the trauma and even though the cause is no longer around the body continues to respond as if it is. They have sleep issues—maybe due to nightmares—chest discomfort, irregular heartbeat, shortness of breath, back and joint pain. These may not be as prevalent but one thing many victims complain about are constant headaches and stomach issues.  I, myself, had such stress as a child that at night I would vomit in my sleep.  Many times, in the middle of the night my parents would wake me up and I was surrounded by my own vomit.  My stomach was so ill even after my father passed; I was diagnosed with IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome.) Though rare and different with every victim this symptom can be very dangerous if not properly treated. 
4. Next,depending on what the trauma they experienced was, victims of this disorder may find it have to act in ways that are expected of them.  Though they have sought out relationships with others how to maintain these relationships could pose a problem.  It is in these cases where you may see a spouse not connecting or caring, a parent being neglectful and uninterested, or a friend constantly changing moods and showing insecurities.    

What Does God Have to Say About It

What does God say about those struggling with PTSD?  Post-traumatic stress disorder is not something spoken about directly in the Bible but there are verses that we can look at for comfort.  

But those who suffer he delivers in their suffering; he speaks to them in their affliction. 

 – Job 36:15 

For many who have suffered a long time, it may seem hard to believe that God could actually stop the pain and suffering that we are experiencing?  As believers, we should never give up hope in knowing that God is with us and that He will work with us through our pains.   

Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.  This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him.  This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins.  Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.  No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us… 

… There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love. 

–1 John 4:8-12, 18 

The fears we have because of the trauma, is not something that God ever intended for man to live with.  Sadly, because of the fallen world we are living in, many face battles in their mind but Gods love is a big part of the cure.  Victims of PTSD need our love to get them through these very rough times.  It is through love that they will know that they are safe and that they are no longer in the position that caused the stress.  I know it may be hard to love those who are struggling because they are unpredictable, on edge, or withdrawn—however God can and will give you wisdom on how to minister to them.  

For those of you who are struggling with PTSD, you need to know that God loves you and it was never His desire for those things to happen to you.  He understands that you may be angry and disappointed with Him but He has not stopped loving you and wants to use His love to remove the fear that this wretched world has put into you and replace it with the love He originally designed for us to have.    

No one can do this alone.  If you do not have a therapist or a counselor that you can go to, here is a link to Bedrock Ministries Bedrock Ministries.  Bedrock is a counseling ministry that will help walk you through this painful season.  They are a counseling ministry that can at least can advise and begin to point you in the right direction.  We would also love to be there for you.  Please feel free to contact us through our email at thruthewinters@gmail.com or comment below.  Also if you would like to hear more about my testimony read my book, “The Threshing: A Weapon Forged by Fire.” Sign up here to read the first three chapters for free!  You can also buy the full book on Amazon!.  We would also love to hear from you.

The Disorder of Losing Order

How does a child process losing every almost everything?  Leaving your job, leaving friends, family, and all that you are familiar with in order to venture off into something new can be scary, lonely and daring. My mother and father wanted a new life for my brother and I. In the beautiful island of Jamaica where there are tourist and cruises galore—poverty and crime knocked on the doors of many of the locals. My parents felt that America had more to offer so they contacted family who were already in the states and asked if my mother and I could come live with them for a short time to get life in America started.  

Leaving Jamaica, my dad, and my brother–who was my everything–to go to a foreign country was more than I could handle at three years old.  April 15, 1981, I left my beautiful tropical island where I wore almost nothing and was sweating during the month of December, to stepping off a plane to be in a huge building in frigid cold spring weather–was one of the shocks my mind would encounter. Wearing a onesie and a pair of sandals was not the ideal attire in this new land. My aunt—who I did not know at the time—quickly greeted my mother and wrapped me up in her coat and we headed to her house.  

I did not know what was going on. Where was my dad? Where was my brother and when were we going home? I remember all too well the confusion of who my new family members were and questioning why we couldn’t see my father and my brother. I eventually settled in my mind that things were different. But just when I got use to the idea of being in a new place that was colder than Jamaica ever got or that I had no backyard to play in and that my brother and father would join “later”…something else rocked me. My mother was not able to stay with us. The rest of my aunt’s family was coming up from Jamaica and my mother would have to find a place so she could start her own life.  

I was devastated the day my mother explained that she was going to have to leave me with my aunt…whom I had only known for a few months, if that. How could she leave me? This couldn’t be happening. My world was spinning. She promised she would come and visit as much as she could but that was not enough. She was my safety; the only thing I had left. I was in a foreign country with people I barely knew. I had not one toy or anything I was used to. But all of that was okay as long as I had her. I would go anywhere as long as she was with me. When she said she was leaving it was like everything that I had been through came to a head. I remember many days of screaming and yelling and clawing at her as she was leaving. My world was ending in my mind..because in a way it was.  

My mind was already experiencing trauma from not understanding what was going on. My mind wasn’t, and nor is any child’s mind, able to process being apart from their parent especially when the parents are their safe haven. It is the place a child runs when they feel afraid or that there is danger. Where was I going to run when I felt unsafe? I wasn’t in any danger, or was I? My aunt was and is still an amazing woman. She tried to take care of me as well as my mother ever could but one of her sons (my cousin) erased that feeling of safety when he started molesting me. I wanted my brother and he fulfilled that feeling a little but when I started to protest, he started threatening to tell my mother not to come to visit me anymore.  

Shortly after I gave into his demands my mother came to visit and I stuck to her like glue. I remember my cousin calling me into the room and I told him “NO.” I thought it was the time my mother was going to take me to her place for the weekend but to my surprise she was unable to take me and when it was time for her to leave, I remember having a full-on tantrum. I held on to her and screamed and held on to the door and fought anyone that came to me. I screamed for my mother for an unusual amount of time and it wasn’t until I was told to “Be quiet or else!”  I knew what was in store for me after.  

What is Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

It is a condition that occurs when someone has gone through a very traumatic experience as I did. Let me explain it this way, when someone is placed in–what they define as– a life-threatening experience there is a switch that God has built into us that changes our way of handling something in a life-threatening situation. Normally, we would take more time to think and rationalize decisions which is why we can watch a TV show and question someone’s decision because we have time to think. But when you have less than a second to decide how to survive, you stop rationalizing, but only react.  

The reacting switch is awesome for soldiers in war, a person in a crashing plane, or someone in a burning building. However, when the war is over, all the passengers are off the plane and the fire is out when someone’s reaction switch is not turned off, that’s when PTSD sets in. For example, it’s when a soldier hears a noise resembling a bomb or grenade (like a firecracker) that will turn that switch on and he will start to react to his surroundings where he was just rationalizing.  

Did you know that it has been said that 5.2 million people between the ages of 18-54 are diagnosed with PTSD. Studies show that the statistics for this is much higher. The sad thing is that 75% of people will experience some type of severely traumatic experience in their lifetime and 20% will develop PTSD.*  

Why would 20 percent of people develop this disorder? I see it in this way.  God never changed his design of man. When He created this world there were things we were not meant to have to experience such as war, murder, rape, molestation, death, car crashes…etc. It was the fall of man that brought those things into existence.  With the Fall came, things that our original minds were not able to handle and deal with, not alone anyway.  Even the trauma of being away from my father and brother was a lot but my mother leaving was too much for me. My mind started going on survival mode by the time my cousin was with me.  

Did you know that early childhood trauma is many times more powerful than that which is experienced as an adult?  It not only generates extreme stress, it disrupts one’s development of mental and emotional abilities to cope with relationship challenges? Every child separates from their parents even for a short period of time.  For me, my mother was my safe haven and my refuge when I was unsafe.   

It Could be Anything

How could sending your child to school for the first time bring on PTSD? Several weeks ago, I watched an interview with a young man and his wife who was talking about the first day of school for their oldest child. Tears started to roll down the man’s face as he was recalling the day that he walked his little girl to the door of the elementary school. Why in the world could this be so traumatic for someone? If you as a parent decide to send your child to school instead of home schooling them, this is a normal process. As a survivor of the 1999 columbine shooting, this 35+ year old man was trying to get through his PTSD. In 1999 his high school was overtaken by two peers who went through their school shooting fellow peers and teachers. When anyone survives an ordeal like this, it makes sense that when it is now their child’s time to be dropped off at school, the memories, the anxiety, fear and the reliving of such a moment would haunt anyone. How would you feel dropping your child off? How would you be on day one, day two or day three? Maybe you could get through pre-school but what would happen when your child was in high school? Would fear run through your spine when your child comes home and talks about kids that were aggressive, boisterous and threatening?  

Do you feel like you are misunderstood, maybe you misunderstand your issues yourself, Through the Winters would like to help you.  In the upcoming month we are going to talk about the  affects of PTSD and the pain of living with this.  Look at this verse.

“If you’ll hold on to me for dear life,” says God,
    “I’ll get you out of any trouble.
I’ll give you the best of care
    if you’ll only get to know and trust me.
Call me and I’ll answer, be at your side in bad times;
    I’ll rescue you, then throw you a party.
I’ll give you a long life,
    give you a long drink of salvation!” Psalms 91:14-16 (MSG)

God is the only way to get through this but we must be willing to hold on to him for dear life.  He will be the one to get us out and take care of us.  We have to learn to call on him and believe that when we have a PTSD episode that he will answer us and he will be by our side during bad times.  But no one can do this alone.  If you do not have a therapist or a counselor that you can go to, here is a link to Bedrock Ministries Bedrock Ministries.  Bedrock is a counseling ministry that will help walk you through this painful season.  They are a counseling ministry that can at least can advise and begin to point you in the right direction.  We would also love to be there for you.  Please feel free to contact us through our email at thruthewinters@gmail.com or comment below.

*Statistics are found in Caring For People God’s Way, by Tim Clinton.