Killer Parenting

Have you ever questioned if our ability to parent our kids is better or worse than animals with less intelligence then us?  Some animals are more attentive then others; whereas others are definitely smarter.  Well it was the near the end of the school year when the kids in my class became obsessed about a bird that would not move out of their way while they were playing soccer.  It was a tiny little bird who made a very obnoxious noise as the kids came closer to it.  Days went by and the story of this relentless bird went through the whole school because the bird became more and more aggressive as it seemed to dominate a part of the soccer field.  It would not fly away no matter how close they got, instead it would chase after the kids as they approached.  As they investigated it more, apparently this bird laid a few eggs right in the middle of the soccer field and the whole time she chased the kids, she was actually trying to protect her nest.  Some of the teachers then placed netting around the area so that the groundskeeper wouldn’t disturb the nest.  They also put cones up for added caution.  With all the caution placed up, it wasn’t long before some predator raided the nest and destroyed all her eggs.

Everyone was sad for it and some people even commended the bird for its bravery in protecting her kids, but it could also be said that the pure foolishness of this inferior creature could be judged for placing her unborn babies in the center of danger.  The “Killdeer Bird” is notorious for laying her eggs in the center of danger.   That’s so stupid, right?  Human’s wouldn’t place their children in the center of danger from the beginning and then spend their parenting time fighting for their kid…right?

Raising Kingdom Kids

Sometime during the summer, I listen to a series by Tony Evans called, “Raising Kingdom Kids.”  It made me stop and think: What if I am nestling my kids in a place of danger just so that I have fight predators because I was too lazy or unskilled to relocate them in a place of safety?  Then I had to question if I was raising KINDGOM kids?  Most parents want their children to succeed and even live the life of royalty and victory, but they are not willing to do the work in order to impart that into them.  I am willing to die for my kids–as this killdeer bird was–but I had to evaluate if I was willing to live for my kids the way Christ wanted me to.

How do I pass on a healthy self-image, self-worth, and future to my children living in a culture that is doing everything in their power to steal that from them?  For example, the whole idea of evolution robs kids of the truth that someone loved them so much that they made them special.  The word “evolution” to me means that I am basically telling my child, “You were nothing but an accident.  You just happened to come forth and you have no purpose in this world but to live in a world that will molest your identity, rape your future and vandalize your present.”  The foolishness of evolution steals the very idea that my kids were created uniquely and with a purpose.

What happens when you take away the idea from a child that someone loves them so much and that they were placed on this earth for a purpose?  We become no better than that killdeer bird.  They are laid out in a field of unnecessary danger, and in front of every predator known to man.  My harsh introduction of this series comes when I was listening to a preaching by Jimmy Evans where he mentioned that Canada was passing—or trying to pass a law—that if parents do not agree with a child’s desire to change their gender, the government will  come into their homes and take their children away from them.  They feel that a parent’s inability to fall in line with a child’s desire to be a different sex altogether, is considered “child abuse”.  As a survivor of severe child abuse—where I was beaten till I defecated on myself because I was 15 minutes late to meet my father at the bus stop— I find the words “Child Abuse” offensive, VERY OFFENSIVE!!!!!  Are we really saying that it is better to tear a child away from a loving parent because they won’t allow their son to wear his sister’s pretend Cinderella glass slippers?  Fill up the orphanages and group homes… and empty the loving homes.  What a sick, demented, wicked world we live in!!   I believe that the direction our society has taken has caused it to lose sight of what is true and that it has blurred the our purpose of life.  God speaks very harshly of those that say what is right is wrong and what is wrong right.  Lord have mercy on us.

We are in a killdeer bird culture that is demanding, us as parents, to train our children to be victims of an ever changing, unstable, unforgiving world.  We think we are making the world fairer and more equal, when all we are really doing is compromising our humanity to become something we were never CREATED to become.  According to National Institute of Mental Health in 2003, suicide was the third highest reason why our kids were dying.  That was 14 years ago and since then our suicide rate, amongst our teens, has raised to an all time high.  We, as parents, exhaust ourselves trying to protect them from being bullied on social media, depression, pornography, promiscuity, substance abuse and more.   Sadly, there are more parents in America who have had to walk in to see that their children killed themselves because the child had no direction and felt there was no purpose in his/her existence.

Parents please believe me that many teachings of this world—in a way— wants to convince our children of its own definition of moral law.  All the while it is robbing them of self worth, values, true innocence, and is causing them to forsake purity.  Before our own eyes this world is ready to violate and strip our precious kids of everything that God has created them to be.  When we allow this to happen, we as their parents, are laying our kids on the battlefield unequipped for the battles that lies ahead and we run after every enemy that shows up like killerdeer bird without a head.

Look at Nehemiah 4:14

“After I looked things over, I stood up and said to the nobles, the officials and the rest of the people, ‘Don’t be afraid of them. Remember the Lord, who is great and awesome, and fight for your families, your sons and your daughters, your wives and your homes.’ ”

How do I fight for my children?

• Parenting God’s Way: According to Tony Evans parenting God’s way is when the parent takes up the responsibility to intentionally oversee the transfer of God’s values and instructions for living in their children.  Deut 6:2 says…

“so that you, your children and their children after them may fear the Lord your God as long as you live by keeping all his decrees and commands that I give you, and so that you may enjoy long life.” 

As I criticize the utter foolishness of the world’s ways, they turn around and criticize mine.  The world finds the ways of God to be restrictive, legalistic and confining.  Jonathan Evans (Tony Evan’s son) and the Chaplain for the Dallas Cowboys said it so well, “If you really want to see if the Word of God is true then stop doing what it says.”  Well what better example of this than where America, as a nation under God, stands right now.  Now that we are straying more from the tyranny of God’s unrealistic, cultic ways and have removed away from God’s teachings and standards as a nation, surely we as an American people are flourishing so much more-we should be since God’s ways are totally wrong.  NOPE!!!  The truth is, we have never been more of a laughing stock amongst other nations then we are now because of how screwed up we are.  Maybe we can get our children back when we are serious about not just talking about the decrees of God but actually keeping them.

• We can’t leave it to society to raise our kids: Do you remember this statement, “It takes a village to raise a child.”  I believe in that, but the village is taking too much power in telling us how we should raise them.  The fault of that has fallen on us though.  We have allowed them to determine the standards in our homes.   Society has become like that guest who stays way too long and eventually takes over.  We no longer have set boundaries and have allowed this ever changing world to have a say so in how we are rearing our children; instead of society conforming to our standards, we have conformed to theirs.  God’s ways and His Word never changes and yet it has kept up with and transcends all time.
• Push your child to make the kingdom over making the team:  Our society is driven by entertainment and sports.  We push our kids to make the gymnastic, soccer and lacrosse team more than we push for them to be a part of church.  We impress on them the need for discipline and structure but rob from them the importance of spiritual health.  We are so focused on feeding our kids healthy but yet we stuff poison down their throat.  God will never bless anything that is seen as more important than Him.

Weekly Challenge:

I would encourage you to purchase Tony Evan’s Book, Raising Kingdom Kids.  I don’t know if you are a parent of teenagers or younger, or maybe you are hoping to be a parent soon, order this book.  It will give you a lot of things to think about and some things you may want to change so that you don’t make the same mistakes that others have.
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