Loving That Sin

Okay, so it’s just us.  No one will know the answer to this question.  Was there any season of sin in your life that you look back on that wish you could do all over again?  Now, now, now don’t get super spiritual.  It’s just you, me and God.  God knows your heart already so in this article, use this time for reflecting honestly.  Is there a part of your old life that was surrounded by sin and you actually loved it?  Yes, it was bad but you enjoyed the sin. I’ll be truthful first.  There was a time when I believed what I was doing at the time wasn’t sin, though looking at it now, it surely was.  It was wrong, but oh how it felt so right at the time.  

Last week, we started our series called, Mangled Motherhood.”  Sarai was first, showing us that there are times we believe God but don’t trust him.  This week, we are going to talk about a woman who raised her daughters in sin and loved it.  Because of the lack of information, there isn’t much to tell us how this mother became the way she was.  Based on what we do see though, we can be sure of a few things.  In order to help us along this story, I am going to exercise my creative license to fill in some gaps.  

When Sin Comes Knocking

This story is found in Genesis 19
As I stated before, last week we had a bible study about Sarah—she is the great-aunt, by marriage, to the woman we are talking about today.  This woman has a very powerful story—teaching us a very serious lesson—but sadly, we are not given her name.  She is just known as “Lot’s wife.”  

Her life changed forever the day her husband came home with two strange men as guests.  Her husband was a very hospitable man as he welcomed them to his home, but these guests look different.  There was something unique about them that had not been seen before.  Lot found these two men in town just sitting and he insisted that they come home with him instead of staying in the city.  He knew that it was never safe for visitors to come into the city and not have a place to stay.  After insisting, the men finally came home with him.  Lot, nor his wife, knew what this night was going to bring.    

Lot was a great host, talking with them, feeding them and giving them a nice warm bed to sleep in.  But before they could sleep, voices came from outside their door.  

Before they went to bed men from all over the city of Sodom, young and old, descended on the house from all sides and boxed them in. They yelled to Lot, “Where are the men who are staying with you for the night? Bring them out so we can have our sport with them!”

Lot went out, barring the door behind him, and said, “Brothers, please, don’t be vile! – Gen. 19:4-7

Things started to get out of hand when the men of the city were demanding Lot bring the men out; not so that they could welcome them or introduce themselves.  Those men wanted to rape and sodomize these visitors.   When Lot would not turn his guests over, the men became more and more violent so Lot offered the unthinkable. 

Loud Silence

Look, I have two daughters, virgins; let me bring them out; you can take your pleasure with them, but don’t touch these men—they’re my guests.” -vs 8 

You read that right, to ease the mob he offered his two virgin daughters to them; that way he could protect the guests.  Yes, the father was giving consent for them to rape and have their way with his daughters instead of protecting everyone under his roof. 

Now I know that we are focusing on motherhood, but it was the father who was making the offer.  Is there something else you do not see?  You do not see any objection from the mother.  When you read on Lot’s wife makes no objection to the request.  Silence speaks just as loud as vocalized words.  Has there ever been a time when someone of authority stayed silent when you needed defending?  

I have listened to heart-wrenching stories of victims who had parents that were not guilty of the act of abuse, but stayed silent when they knew about the violation  In almost all cases, the child was just as upset, if not angrier, at the silent parent than the violator.  If you have been through something like this, how de-valued or unloved did you feel?  You might have thought that you could at least rely on that one parent to be there for you but in return, they gave you silence along with turning a blind eye. 

 Lot’s wife watched as her husband wined and dined these strangers, yet offer up their daughters to a mob for them to defile.   If you didn’t catch it, these girls had husbands and were virgins!!!   It was most likely that they were engaged, and in those days to be engaged was to be married, minus the physical acts of husband and wife.  In any case, had those men in the city were to have agreed to take Lot on his offer, the girls would have been considered damaged goods and their husbands would never want to be with them ever again.     

As much as we can look at this mother and condemn her for her silence, we need to look at ourselves.  It may not be in the same ballpark, but are there things we stayed silent about because we were too scared to stand up?     

When Sin Trumps Salvation

Even though Lot felt like the answer to the mob’s desire to have sex with the new men was to give their virgin daughters, the men wanted the guests.  The mob started to get really violent—understand the mob consisted of men, young, old, small and great.  Every single man in the whole town was there—and began to push through the door (19:4).  Those guests were not just regular guests, they were angels sent to bring destruction on the city for the deplorable acts going on there.  The angels moved Lot out of the way and struck all the men with blindness.  God told Lot he needed to get his family and leave.  The next morning Lot, his wife and daughters packed what they could to leave.  Sadly, Lot could not convince his sons-in-law to come because they loved where they lived despite what had already taken place.  

As the morning was coming, the angels urged Lot and his family to hurry because the danger was coming.  With all that they witnessed, Lot and his family still lingered and moved as slow as they could in getting ready.  They had seen what the men of the town were up to and witnessed the power of their guest but they still moved uninterested and slowly.  It wasn’t until the angels grabbed Lot, the wife and the daughters by the hands, and almost dragged them out of the city, that they were able to leave.  As they were being rescued the angel said, 

“Now run for your life! Don’t look back! Don’t stop anywhere on the plain—run for the hills or you’ll be swept away.”

“Don’t look back.”

What an easy thing to say but a hard thing to do.  What do you do when God rescues you from sin you enjoy committing?  I know that no one would ever admit to enjoying certain times of sin, but only God knows that not everyone he rescues wants to be rescued.  That sounds horrible to say, but there are some alcoholics who are killing themselves but love how they are dying.  There are people in clubs partying their butts off—once, maybe twice a week—with their friends and love the atmosphere.  There are those sleeping with a new person every few months and love every minute of it.  Let’s not pretend that sin isn’t attractive.  If it wasn’t attractive then it would be called temptation.   We can lie to our friends and lie to ourselves that we hated that life but the truth is, not every aspect of our sinful life was detestable to us even though it should have been.  

Ther are Christians who question why we can’t do certain things when it makes us feel so good.  God desires to rescue us and he doesn’t want us to look back on our old lives.  Unfortunately, some of us are still very connected to our sin. So at times sin trumps salvation.

So what did Lot’s wife do?

“… Lot’s wife looked back…” –vs 26a

This scripture is so simple but it says so much.  We are like a moth to the flame and so was Lot’s wife.   This wife, this mother, did what she was instructed not to do.  Something within her could not handle looking forward.  She was hearing her home being destroyed.  Fire was falling on her hometown, those she may have become close with were dying, her sons-in-law were dying in the fire.  She had to look back.  She had to see what was going on, I know I would.  She went against her better judgment and looked behind her to see what happened.  As soon as she took that glance, something was happening.  She was feeling different, her feet started feeling weird, her hands felt strange, and her face course.  Not only did she look back but then she…

“…turned into a pillar of salt.” –vs 26b

I have heard this story several times as a teenager and I had it in my mind that the flames were in the back and the angels were running with them when Lot’s wife looked over her shoulder to get a glance and turned into salt.  That is not what took place.  The truth is that the angels got Lot and his family far away from danger and they were in a place of safety (19:23).  It was when they were all safe THEN she looked back, not just with her eyes, but with her heart.  Her daughters watched their mother’s legacy end when she was more in love with her sin than her Savior.

Weekly challenge:

What message are you conveying to your children?  Do you glamourize sin and may your new life with God appear to be more of a burden than a blessing?  Read Luke 17:32. Do you want to be remembered for not being able to let go of your sin?

Feel free to comment below or email us on the side for additional help.  Also, you can follow us on Facebook or Instagram @throughthewinters.com.

Also, our newest book is out!!

We have worked really hard to talk about the war that Christians are in. We are meant to win every battle set before us but there are many times we get in our way.  What are some things we need to learn in order to never lose another spiritual battle again?  Buy our Book on Amazon to find out.

VLOG Stage 2 from Through the Winters on Vimeo.

Have you ever stood on top of a hill and tried to describe something that was far away?  Yes, you see the item and can see the shadow but are the details of the item clear?  Well sometimes our distance from God causes a distorted view of him.  We see him but the details of who he is, are too vague to describe.  What do we do to have a better view of God when we are in a period of pain?  This Vlog challenges you to draw closer to the father.  Stop having a long distance relationship with your father. I pray this blesses you.

Mangled Motherhood

How can we mother our children without screwing them up? Isn’t that the hope of most mothers? We bring life into the world, and they look to us for everything. When they arrive, they don’t care about our weight, our beauty, our talents or the amount in our bank account. They know the rhythm of our heartbeat and the base in our voice. We become their go-to source when facing new peers in pre-school, to having that first crush, packing up for college, to when they slip on that wedding ring. Then maybe, just maybe, they bring forth a new life of their own.  In between those stages of life, we as mothers can get in the way of God’s plan. Parents, at times, live vicariously through their children and lead them in ways we feel is best suited; never asking God for directions. And if we do, we never listen for an answer.

During the month of May, we are going to study four women from the Bible who made mistakes in which we can all learn from. We may just find that their mistakes are not that different from our own. The goal is to learn from these mistakes. What they did right and what they did wrong. By the end of each study, I hope that you can reflect it to how you parent

This Mom’s Story

This story takes place in Genesis 16, 17, 18 and 21

Let’s go back about 4-5 thousand years ago to a very wealthy couple whose names are Sarah (who was 64 years old) and her husband Abraham (who was 75 years old). They owned cattle, land, servants, and gained the respect of those around the area. With everything that they possessed, one thing remained foreign to them; they did not have any children. There was no family to whom they could pass down their estate. At their age, the idea of having children was out of the question. Children represented God’s blessing. With all that Abraham and Sarah possessed, they still lacked the one true blessing of all, a child.

Sarah and Abraham got over the disappointment of barrenness and just expected to give their estate to one of their servants. They seemed content with where they were… until–there is always an “until”– God plants a dream in both their hearts. In Gen 15:1-18 God makes a covenant with Abram that, even though he was too old to have a child, his wife would give him a son. Vs 6- says that he believed in the Lord, but he had to convince Sarah to believe with him. The Bible does not say that God spoke to Sarah directly. It doesn’t even record the conversation they had, but we can see that she believed because it showed when time passes and she begins to doubt.

“And Sarai said to Abram, ‘Behold now, the Lord has prevented me from bearing children. Go in to my servant; it may be that I shall obtain children[a] by her.’ And Abram listened to the voice of Sarai.” – Gen 16:2

Sarah believed that God was going to give her elderly husband a child, but maybe from another woman. Now, someone could read it and think that she only waited for a little while for God’s promise; however, in actuality, she waited 10 years before coming up with this idea. She was now 74 and her husband was 85 when she made this suggestion. Sarah wanted to help God bring about his promise and maybe Abraham understood it wrong. She thought that this was a good idea, but how many times do we have good ideas which lead us into periods of darkness?

Is there something that God has shared with you that you are trying to help God accomplish because it’s taking a long time? Are you getting impatient? Do you think you heard him wrong? Well, Sarah convinces her husband to have sex with one of her servants, Hagar, and he got her pregnant. How could her husband go along with something like that? As wives and mothers, we need to understand, it is something unexplainable but, there is a level of trust that our husbands and children place on us that we can’t take for granted or take advantage of. We need to be careful what direction we lead them in. Don’t allow your impatience and doubt to conceived something that was never meant to be conceived.

You Can’t Always Erase Your Mistake

Sarah was planning to take the baby from Hagar and treat the child like her own—this would satisfy God’s promise to give Abraham a child…right? Well, things backfired when Hagar did get pregnant and started looking down on Sarah. There is nothing more contentious then to have two women in the same room that want the same man, but what was it like when one is pregnant?

Sarah didn’t want to admit it but it was her own idea that caused her world to turn upside down. Her anger was turned against Hagar and Hagar ran away. I’m sure that Sarah thought her problems were solved when she found out that her servant left; however, God showed Himself to Hagar and told her how powerful her unborn baby was going to be. Just because Hagar was out of Sarah’s sight didn’t mean she was out of God’s mind. There are some mistakes that aren’t so easily forgotten. There are things that you can’t just wish away.

Why didn’t God show up to Sarah? What was Sarah’s thought when Hagar returned back a few days later. Has there ever been a mistake that you made, that you wanted to just wish away? You know that it was wrong but there was nothing you could do to get rid of it. Now Sarah not only had to live with her servant’s change of attitude but she now had to watch Hagar walk around with her promise in her womb; she had everything she ever wanted.

“What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you?  You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God. When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures.” -James 4:1-3

Sometimes the root of our bitterness is birthed from envy, strife and wrong motives.

The Inconvenience of a Miracle

So what happened next? 13 years later Sarah was still not pregnant, but God had not forgotten her even though she thought He had. In Genesis 18 God shows up to remind Abraham of his promise. This time he tells Abraham in verse 10 that one year from that date Sarah would give birth to a son.

Now, Sarah was at earshot of the promise and vs12 says that Sarah laughed at it. She didn’t laugh because of happiness, or relief that she was finally going to get the promise. If you were her what would your laugh be about? If it were me my laugh would be… “Oh, I have heard that before?” or “I was fine without this promise” or “NOW!! After 25 years, you want to come now!?”

She was now about 88 or 89!!! Think about it, this was a response to an inconvenient promise. How do you think she would do with not just taking care of a newborn but being pregnant… at 88, having morning sickness… at 88, being in labor… at 88 nursing a baby… at 88? The truth is she was cynical because she most likely felt that here God gives a promise, He doesn’t come through so she takes matters into her hands and now, at an inconvenient time, He comes to fulfill on His promise? The truth is, her laugh could have been anything but it sure was not one of belief. God questioned her in vs 14 saying,

“Is there anything too hard for the Lord?”

Sarah responds by denying that she laughed.  One year later, everything that God promised came to pass; she had a baby boy named, Isaac. Life should be good now but it wasn’t.

“The child grew and was weaned, and on the day Isaac was weaned Abraham held a great feast.  But Sarah saw that the son whom Hagar the Egyptian had borne to Abraham was mocking,  and she said to Abraham, ‘Get rid of that slave woman and her son, for that woman’s son will never share in the inheritance with my son Isaac.’” -Gen. 21: 8-10

What can we learn from her?
Her act of helping God was now her thorn in her side. She could not enjoy God’s miracle in peace because her consequence for doubting God was now taunting her. What happened in the 25 years of waiting for her miracle, that we can learn from?

1. 1. Waiting brings to surface the things we need to change.-  Sarah’s doubt and manipulation could have ruined what God wanted to do with Isaac.  It was during the waiting period that who you really are, comes out.  It is during this time you express your true insecurities, your doubts, your lack of faith, struggles with obedience and your tendency to control things.
   2. God wants to gain a relationship with you before the blessing– Was Sarah serving God for the promise or for the relationship?  Don’t serve God for what you can get, serve him for who he is.  Don’t cling to God for what you think you can get from him.  During this time draw closer to God so you can see that there is nothing impossible for God.
   3. God is looking to make a miracle while we are looking for mediocrity- Pregnancy is a part of life.  You don’t need to have faith to believe that a. woman can get pregnant.  Sarah was looking for a baby and God was looking to make a miracle.  Sometimes we miss the big picture of God’s plan.  We want the same old blessing, however, God is in the business of making an ordinary act, extraordinary.

Weekly challenge:

-Speak life into your situation, not death. Leave your opinion out of your circumstances – ( Proverbs 18:2 Fools find no pleasure in understanding  but delight in airing their own opinions.)

-Gathering up scriptures to reinforce God’s promises.

-Talking back to the enemy when he tries to get you to doubt.
God still used Sarah despite her failures and her impatience. God can use you as well.
Read: Psalm 130:5, Isaiah 30:18 and Isaiah 30:21

Please feel free to comment below and Follow us on Facebook and Instagram @throughthewinters.com.

ME…

What posses the most threat to your life at this moment?  When I mean life, I don’t necessarily mean the action of existing through the act of breathing and moving.  I mean, is there something that is threatening your ability to thrive as you are meant to?  What is keeping you from thriving?  For the month of April, we only scratched the surface of what it really means to be a warrior.  There has to come a time when we stop running from the very things that bring us fear and fight back so much so that we bring fear to our enemy.  There are times when the enemy waits till we are in a good place to order fire on us; we must inquire of the Lord for every move we make.  We addressed the question, what causes a warrior to emerge?  Sadly, a warrior is made from some of the most heart-wrenching circumstances.  During these times, we realize that in becoming a warrior you must surround yourself with mighty men as well.  

With everything that life has to throw at us, one must wonder what is the biggest challenge in being that warrior God has called us to be?  Well let me tell you every morning I wake up, say a prayer and depending on the day I either study my word, listen to a sermon or dream. Dream? Yes, there are times when I lay in my bed and dream with my eyes open. I allow myself to dream the destiny that I think God has dropped in my spirit. I think about this ministry “Through the Winters” and dream of all the people God is going to place before me to help. I think about rewriting my first book and getting my story into the hands of people who feel like there is no hope.

These dreams are my ammo against the lies of Satan.  Today, they are dreams but one day I hope to make them a reality.  There is only one person standing in front of me, that keeps me from turning these dreams into reality.  One who doesn’t think I can make it?  Do you know who it is that is constantly reminding me of my failures, my shortcomings, and my weaknesses? Yes, you guessed it…ME. 

I have learned that over the course of my life my worst enemy was hiding in my own head, masking my critical thoughts as something else. My worst enemy wasn’t my abusive father. It wasn’t even the cousin who molested me. My worst enemy isn’t the devil. It would be so much easier for me if these characters were, then I would have to fight. Unfortunately, that is not the case.

Sabotage

You and I share the same enemy, it’s in a different form, but it’s the same.  Each morning, I look my enemy in the eyes after I finish my devotion. The one who can stand in the way of everything God has for me that day and it’s…me.  The one trying to sabotages my progress with God is me.  I am my worst enemy and you are yours.  I am more powerful than Satan in this area. I can get into my own head with free access.  I can talk myself out of obeying God.  I can make flesh and blood my foe.  I can turn my Savior into my adversary. If  I am creative enough I can see evil in good and good in evil.  I’m always present when I fail and doubting myself when I am victorious.  Where Satan lie and try to persuade me, I can create ideas about myself and my destiny— in secret where no one hears but me and God.  I talk myself out of the promises of God and jump to the front of the line to accuse myself of my own wrongs.  I don’t need Satan to remind of my faults because I tattooed them on the frontal lobe of my mind.  I give him ideas on how to bring me to my own demise. Who needs Satan when we have ourselves?  Truth is sometimes I label my attack, “Satanic” just to protect the real enemy which is, again, me.

I remember when I was in my early teens and my father had passed away.  I sat on my bed thinking about an experience I had at a youth convention.  It was at this convention that the Lord showed me that he had a husband and a family for me.  The thought of having a husband and children was so far from my mind at that time that I could not wrap my mind around it.  During that time I was friends with a young man in the youth group whom I really liked.  He was the only other person, besides my best friend, I had told about my past.  I felt so good being able to share it with my own peers and to talk to them when I felt hurt.  Unfortunately, I did not see him for his true self.  The young man soon found out that I started liking him and he took advantage of it and I let him.

He continued to ask “favors” of me, and when I wouldn’t give into his request, he would violate me, talk down to me and make me feel like trash.  He was not at fault for this, I was.  Hear me out.  I wasn’t at fault for his violation but I was at fault for thinking I couldn’t get anything better. I even thought that if I were to marry him—or anyone like him—I probably deserved whatever abuse I received. I figured that this was as good a gift as God could give such a screwed up person like myself.  I was so wrong.  The husband God had for me was an example of his goodness and mercy.  He doesn’t give us what we deserve—otherwise, there would be no grace or mercy.

I heard Pastor Steven Furtick quote from Charles Spurgeon once saying,  “My greatest enemy is myself. Beware of no man more than of yourself: We carry our worst enemies within us.”

When I am dreaming with my eyes open, I am laying next to a man that I thought was impossible to have. I say “good morning” to the four miracles whom I can hold in my arms.  I then make my way into the bathroom, look at myself in the mirror and doubt every single dream I just dreamt of God.  I tell myself how everything I saw in my heart is too expensive, too uncomfortable, too farfetched and too radical. 

How do I fight myself though?   Just before I can count my own self out, I must do what Steve Furtick said to do: “consume, consume.” I need to allow my most consuming thoughts to be consumed by the truth of God.  That’s one of the most powerful ways to fight your greatest enemy.  I am comforted that my most consuming, painful, reminders of my brokenness, is no match for the promise God has.  He is going to finish the good work he has started in me (Phil 1:6).  

When I think to myself that what lies before me is impossible, I say instead, “Yes this is impossible, AMEN, because when it is impossible for me, it IS possible with God!!”  When I think I am a weak, cowardly sinner, I remember that with Christ I am a called, justified, glorified child of God who is MORE than a conqueror!  Listen, God doesn’t just want me to stop at conquering. He wants me to do MORE than just conquering (Romans 8:30).

Weekly Challenge:

Read Philippians 1:6 and Romans 8:30 for yourself.  Friend, you don’t have to be a helpless victim of your thoughts. This is not an easy enemy to fight. You can’t do it alone. What are the sabotages you set yourself up for so that you don’t have what God intended? Take the time to get a journal, a sheet of paper, or even your phone and write them down. Then step back for a moment. Have you totally given your life over to God so that you can let His word consume you? If not, what is holding you back?  We would love to hear from you in the comments below or via email.

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What Makes the Heart of A Warrior Surface

What is it like to live like a warrior? What is life like when you are known for being a force to be reckoned with on the battlefield? Some people may think that it’s glamorous to wield such power and have such a reputation, but is that true? Has anyone ever wondered what it is that causes a person to decide to put the one life they were given, on the line against vicious enemies? Living as a warrior is not an easy task at all. Many may admire a warrior coming home from a battle and be inspired by him, but they have do not understand the reasoning behind the action.

I love my movie nights with my husband where we usually watch some kind of war film or something with superheroes. Lately, we’ve been getting into doctor shows, but that would mess up my point.  Anyway, these movies are my version of a “chick flick.” The top movies that I love are ones that take place on a battlefield or a reenactment of war. I don’t watch all of those kinds of movies because of the potty words, but the ones that are do-able are precious to me.

The very first movie Sam and I watched, as a dating couple, was “Braveheart.” It still stands as our number one movie. It was inspired by a true story that takes place in the late 13th century; during the war of the Scottish Independence. It starts off in Scotland where mere peasant men decide to go and negotiate with the English invaders. The English do not honor any agreement and kill all of the negotiators. William Wallace, a boy around ten years of age, is saddened by the fact that now his father and brother were going to war without him. The English had oppressed the Scottish and the men in the area weren’t going to lay down and let it happened any longer.

It wasn’t long before William’s father and brother are brought back dead, both killed in battle. How would he live his life without these strong men leading and guiding him? Fortunate for William, his uncle took on the responsibility of raising him. He would leave his home and become educated in various cultures. His uncle even promised him that he would teach William how to fight with a sword, but first, he needed to learn how to fight with his brain.

Years go by and William Wallace grows up to be a strong man and England grows to be an even stronger force. By the time Wallace returns, the English had passed a law called “Premi Nocta.” It is a law that states that any new bride will be taken on her wedding night by the English Governor of that district to have sex with her before her husband. The men of Scotland were fed up and decided to rage war against their oppressors, and they asked Wallace to join. Wallace, however, did not want to start a war. He wanted to live in peace even though England continued to steal land and violate the women. He had his eye on a beautiful bride, and that was his goal…ok I know it’s starting to sound like a chick flick but is not…maybe a little.

Wallace looks for a peasant girl by the name of Murron who he loved from when he was a boy. After he woos her, he secretly takes her as his wife. The love they had was obvious, and it caught the attention of one of the guards. Thinking that Wallace was not around, they tried to rape Murron, but as she fought back, William comes to her aid and fights her attackers. The two now try to run to safety and William tell Murron to go ahead as he distracts their pursuers. Murron along the way gets captured where William escapes. She is brought to the center of the village by the English Magistrate and slits her throat for all to see. “An attack on the king’s guards is like an attack on the king himself!” the Magistrate screams out as he kills Murron.

Why Fight When There is No Threat

Now, the very man who wanted nothing to do with war was now ready to make war the moment something precious was taken from him. When word got to William of his wife’s murder, it was not long for him to rally a band of militia, kill dozens of guards, slit the Magistrate’s throat the same way Morrun was killed and burn down the English base. Wallace had now waged war on England.

Why fight when there is no struggle, no danger or threat? William Wallace is an excellent example of stirring up a hornet’s nest. When someone fights for a purpose, they are driven by something outside of their comfort. They could care less what it will cost, the pain, the sacrifice or the discipline needed; they want to be a part of the solution to injustice. Warriors usually fight because something is challenging the existence of something that they find valuable.

Many Christians are like William Wallace in the beginning. They see that the enemy is taking from their fellow believers, but because it doesn’t come to their front door, it means nothing to them; it’s not worth leaving the comfort they have or forsaking the dream they are pursuing. We want to live in peace without conflict, but sometimes real peace comes from conflict.

What is the Definition of Warrior

Can you be labeled a warrior if you’ve never fought? You can have a soldier that never saw battle, but you can’t have a warrior that never saw war. To be a warrior you need experience. That means that struggle has come, wars have been fought, your life is challenged, and you lived to share the story. You are known for overcoming your enemy when the odds were against you. You are known for fighting with and for your fellow soldiers. I wanted to be this kind of warrior; I didn’t want to be the soldier who enlisted but never saw battle.

Once Murron was killed the fight in Wallace came out. What will it take for the fight in you to come out? Are you chasing after something that can’t happen until you’ve strapped on your gear and fight the fight of your life? Do you dream of peace, a life with freedom and victory? Well, some dreams can’t be obtained without removing the things that challenge it. Freedom may not be experienced until you challenge your oppressor and lastly, you can’t have victory without a battle.

Before we go storming into battle, we need to do a few things.

1) Know your enemy. Click to read our article. Don’t rage war on a force without knowing what they are capable of. Everyone is driven by something; you have to know what is driving them.

2) Know your God. As much as we want to allow our strength to determine the end result; the truth remains that God is our shield and strength for times like this. There is no winning a battle for freedom, peace, and victory without getting your God involved.

3) Be willing to leave it all behind to go on the battlefield. There is a reason why soldiers don’t have their families in the trenches with them. Not only will they get hurt but they can be a distraction. There are times when you have to remove all distractions and civilian life to defeat the enemy who has threatened what you love.

Weekly Challenge:

Read Matthew 11:2.  What, in your life, do you need to take by force?  We can not allow the enemy to continue to come in and rob us, destroy what we have built, and not rage war. Think about it and start asking God how to fight back.

Below, feel free to comment or if you need additional help, email us on the side. Also, follow us on Facebook and Instagram @throughthewinters.com.

Also, our newest book is out!!

We have worked really hard to talk about the war that Christians are in. We are meant to win every battle set before us but there are many times we get in our way.  What are some things we need to learn in order to never lose another spiritual battle again?  Buy our Book on Amazon to find out.

Through the Winters: That Ugliness is God from Through the Winters on Vimeo.

Think of an uncomfortable time of your life.  Was there confusion, disappointment, pain, and fear?  That was not God, or was it?  God would never allow confusion, disappointment or pain…or would he?  God is God and his ways are higher than our ways, his thoughts are better than our thoughts. He can orchestra a series of ugliness in order to bring us back.  In this Vlog, we talk about the other side of salvation.  I pray this video ministers to you.

Can You Defeat What You Don’t Know

As a total fan of the hit show, Hawaii Five-O, I am always blown away by the different challenges facing this elite task force. The team was formed by an unfavorable event in Steve McGarrett’s, the leader of the team, life. As a Navy Seal, McGarrett was serving his country and bringing down a group of criminals when his phone rang. It was his father who was tied up by the brother of a man Steve was bringing in. Somehow they knew Steve enough to find his father and try to blackmail him. (Spoiler Alert)-After Steve’s father is killed, Steve spends a large portion of the first season trying to figure out who attacked his family.

How important is it to know who your enemy is? Can you honestly defeat them without understanding where they came from or what their goal is? Have you thought of your adversary the Devil? When we think about how he has stolen, killed and destroyed the very things we love—do we just sit back and let him do it? Have you ever thought of where your enemy came from and where he is going? As a child, I was educated that this nasty devil—who hates anything that God loves and who tries to destroy everything good and kind—was initially made by God himself. Stop and think about that. We fight a creature that was originally made by the same God we serve. Now some will get all philosophical about it all, but I want to take you somewhere else.

Can You Fight Perfection

Can you think of anything that God made that was not perfect? Is there anything that God created that we deem mediocre, ugly or foolish? If we understand the Creator, we know the creation.

In Ezekiel 28, there is a description of Lucifer (his God-given name) before the fall. Between  verse 12-19 we see some descriptions that many scholars agree are those of Satan. In verse 12 it says that he, Satan, was the seal of perfection. There was not one flaw in Lucifer. There was no sin in him; there was no iniquity in him when God made him. He was perfect in wisdom. He was anointed and ordained a guardian angel. God gave him a high position in this heavenly army. He was described as “blameless.” The word blameless means that he was perfect, guiltless, irreproachable and virtuous and all of this was found in his actions.

When you put it all together, we are fighting a being that was once perfect, wise, anointed, ordained, blameless, and guiltless. What happened to this great creation? Read verse 15b-17

 “… wickedness was found in you.
Through your widespread trade, you were filled with violence, and you sinned. So I drove you in disgrace from the mount of God, and I expelled you, guardian cherub, from among the fiery stones. Your heart became proud on account of your beauty, and you corrupted your wisdom because of your splendor. So I threw you to the earth;”

He was perfect until wickedness was found in him. Where did the wickedness come from in Lucifer? He was in Heaven, and there was no tree of knowledge of good and evil, there was no serpent to tempt him. How could wickedness be found in someone so perfect, who lived in an ideal world, serving a perfect God? How could a creation that was in an atmosphere of peace and serenity be full of violence? You have to remember that there was no war ever in Heaven because God had no enemies, so how did he know about war and violence? It says that Lucifer sinned.

How could he sin without someone tempting him as we have Satan tempting us? From the beginning of it all, those created by God followed the Most High with love and admiration. No one knew what sin was because there was no reason to go against the rules of God. Somehow this blameless being was unhappy with what he was told and missed the mark God placed before him. The question is, did God go to Lucifer— as he did to Cain in Genesis 4—and warn Lucifer to be careful because sin was knocking at his door? God does not have a reputation of seeing his children heading into danger and not trying everything possible to stop them or warn them.

Whichever way, Lucifer did not fight the urge, and he sinned against God without the need of a tree with forbidden fruit or a slithering reptile to entice him. He looked at himself and started to admire his beauty, and the most dangerous ingredient was added to his character…pride. His admiration of himself corrupted his thinking. God gave him divine wisdom, and he damaged that wisdom. The sin of pride found in him was the most dangerous of all, and sadly, this is also seen in us. Pride is at the base of several sins. It’s pride that can break up a family, destroys a marriage, brings down a company, demolishes an empire, and levels the future of a strong and powerful ministry. It is pride that makes us think we are above the law of sin and death. Pride is what makes us feel we can touch what God has not given to us. Its even arrogance that allows us to think more highly of ourselves than we ought to.

After observing all these verses look at the end of this one, “I threw you to the earth.” Not only was he thrown onto earth, but Revelation 12:4 recalls his demise and says that the dragon’s tail (Lucifer) swept 1/3 of the stars (angels) out of the sky and flung them to earth too. Satan was able to deceive 1/3 of angels to go against their leader. He convinced them, somehow, that he was more powerful and more capable of leading them than God Almighty. So not only was one perfect being, in a perfect, state corrupted by his pride—he deceived an innumerable amount of perfect angels to follow him as well. Stop and think with me for a minute here…this cunning, conniving, sinful, deceptive, wicked, egotistical, prideful creature is OUR ENEMY!!!!!!

He is on earth invisible to our naked eye nevertheless we can see his handiwork every day. It was God’s plan for us to have dominion over this beast and his fellow fallen comrades, however in the garden, we handed over our authority to him, just like those angels did, and allowed him to deceive us. Just like a third of the angels, man chose to listen to Satan instead of following God.

We Get Another Chance Guys!

Surely if God were to give man another chance, removed the tree, allowed us only to worship him, and gave us full knowledge of our enemy, man would never turn their backs on God or fall into the enemy’s trap. Hmmm…I don’t know. The powerful deceptive nature of our enemy is seen the most in the book of Revelation. In Revelation 20 it says that—before the complete end of this world—there will be a 1000 year reign of Christ, and Christ alone. The only ones that remain will be the ones to survive the tribulation. During this tribulation, faithful believers will go through so much pain and struggle that the Bible says that if God does not shorten those days, humanity will not be able to survive according to Matt 24:22. These people will have such a love for God that they would rather be beheaded than to allow themselves to follow the enemy. These amazing people are the ones who survive to reign with Christ for 1000 years! During this time Satan will be bound up in 20:2 and will not be allowed to deceive or tempt the believers.

Let’s just take a minute and pretend you are one of those special people that make it through that relentless time. Imagine 1000 years (3x longer than America has been a nation) serving God in this world without Satan. Everybody on earth has the same desire to serve God. Their faith has already been tested for seven long years with extreme war, violence, poverty, wickedness, drug abuse, starvation and much more. They resisted all of that and had come out on the other side. Now there is complete freedom to serve the Lord; no Satan, no deception, only God to worship with everything in us.

With an atmosphere of pure, uncorrupted worship, you would think that Satan’s hold would be null and void. How could he deceive a nation, a people that survived his most brutal and violent attacks? How could he deceive a people that had been saturated in the real unrestrained presence, communication, and goodness of God? How could he fool all of humanity a second time? Could Satan actually get any of us to turn against God that we have served faithfully for 1000 years? Well, my friend, he doesn’t get one of those dedicated believers…but a number that can’t be measured!!!!

“When the thousand years are over, Satan will be released from his prison and will go out to deceive the nations in the four corners of the earth—Gog and Magog—and to gather them for battle. In number, they are like the sand on the seashore.  They marched across the breadth of the earth and surrounded the camp of God’s people, the city he loves. But fire came down from heaven and devoured them.”  -Revelation 20:7-9

Can you believe that even in a perfect utopia where the people of God have no enemy, Satan is capable of getting us to turn against God, again?! This is the kind of enemy we are fighting my friend. We can pretend all we want, but in the end, if we do not submit everything over to God, we will find ourselves being the victim of an enemy who has been around since before the creation of this earth.

So how do we fight such a deceptive enemy? Well, first we must recognize that we can not underestimate Satan nor overestimate the strength of our flesh. Second, we must submit to God because He alone knows every move Satan will make, his weakness, his strengths and his tactics. Third, we must obediently saturate ourselves in God’s word and prayer so not to allow the same pride that destroyed him and the other fallen angels fill our mind and make us think we don’t need God. I hope that these four weeks have been enlightening as we have seen that good and evil doesn’t look that much different when we are looking at it through hurting eyes click to read. We talked about the importance of fighting right click to read. Sometimes we struggle with those God has given us for this hash journey. Also, we talked about knowing our enemy. Satan does what he can to make his existence obsolete click to read. Please take this time to look at our video for added support.

Also, our newest book is out!!

We have worked really hard to talk about the war that Christians are in. We are meant to win every battle set before us but there are many times we get in our way.  What are some things we need to learn in order to never lose another spiritual battle again?  Buy our Book on Amazon to find out.

Superman Vs Batman

What happens when we spend our time fighting someone who is not our real enemy? We fight as though they were out to do us in, but in truth, both parties are used as pawns by a third who has his own agenda.

I see it in so many movies and T.V. series where two people spend time brawling with each other all the while ignoring their real enemy. I absolutely LOVE snuggling with my hubby every Friday night after youth group for our weekly movie.  We may order Chinese food that night, pop popcorn, feast on chocolate or anything else just to make our movie night amazing.  We don’t pick movies that are girly flicks about strangers falling in love or a loving mother and daughter who are broken when the mother was diagnosed with some deadly disease.  I want something more realistic, something more believable…like…like a man who dresses up like a dark knight saving his city, let’s call it Gotham. He has villains to fight…let’s say that one villain is some random guy who call himself the…Joker.  Now that’s based on real life! That’s something I can relate with, none of that lovey- dovey stuff that happens in some far off land.
I love watching things blow up way in the background while the hero is walking towards the camera fixing his sleeves. Let’s be real, I am not really snuggling with my hubby, I’m usually screaming or hitting him out of pure wonder and anticipation. The screaming can totally be heard by my kids on the second floor, by the way.

Recently I saw the movie Batman vs. Superman with Ben Affleck and Henry Cavill. In this movie, Batman was convinced that Superman was the villain because in a battle between Superman and another villain, it seemed as though Superman was causing chaos and bringing danger to those who were mere humans. Batman grew determined to destroy Superman when one of Superman’s battles caused a collision into a building that killed others that Batman cared for. This was it! He was not going to sit back and let an alien vigilante go on any longer. Batman thought Superman had to be stopped. At the same time, Superman felt that Batman was out of control and he had a similar goal – to stop him. They were fighting against each other, not knowing that there was another real enemy behind the scenes.  (Spoiler alert) At one point in the movie, Batman comes really close to killing Superman. It was so disturbing for me, as a diehard Batman fan, to see anger and revenge consume this hero so much that the truth could not be seen by him. Batman and Superman were wearing each other out while the real danger was growing stronger and stronger by the minute. As the fight was getting crucial, I could not forget the face Batman and Superman had when it finally dawned on them that they had been the victim of a mutual adversary. Batman’s world had stopped as he realized that all of his efforts were futile, empty, and ineffective because Superman was actually trying to help not hurt him.

The Cost of Getting it Wrong

When we fight a fight against a false enemy, it can cause our world to be flipped upside down. Not only that, it set up defenses in the wrong place. Our focus is not locked on the right target and we become blind to the attack being set up by the true evil one. Sadly, when the real attack happens, it is more powerful and destructive because we weren’t prepared for it. We are too drained and powerless because we poured out all our strength on the wrong things and spent so much time fighting what wasn’t real.

There are many of us who fight emotional, mental, and even spiritual wars everyday. We have enough Jesus to get to heaven but not enough faith to walk in victory.  I remember doing the exact same thing when I was younger. After many attempts to gain my mother’s love and acceptance, I finally realized that I was not going to get it when I wanted it. So, I turned her into my enemy instead – I became Batman. For years after I received Christ, I prayed for her to give her heart to the Lord. My brother and I witnessed to her and prayed, but she wouldn’t accept Christ as her savior until months after my father had passed away.

You would think that I would have been happy after that, but all of a sudden I started to blame her for so many things. I blamed her for allowing my father to be so cruel to me and my brothers. I felt that she had turned a blind eye to the things that I had gone through. I know she saw the welts on my back from my father’s beatings, yet she did nothing. I resolved in my mind that my mother was never there for me when I needed it and my bitterness consumed me. Eventually I started thinking about how I had to go to church all by myself at the age of 6. Strangers loved me more than she did, I thought. I made up in my mind that she was my enemy and believed that, though I loved her, she never loved me back. I grew to detest her more because I felt that she failed me as a mother.

It was much later that she told me that the hardest season of her life, was not the sudden death of my father, but the pain I inflicted on her during my time of rebellion and bitterness. You would think that after me praying for her for so many years that her rededication to the Lord would have been exactly what I wanted. Instead, Satan used me against her. I spent so much time fighting my mother and others that when the enemy finally exposed himself, I was too spiritually weak to fight him off and I needed people to pray for me.

Darn It! That’s Wasn’t My Enemy?

Today I honestly say that the one who prayed for me the most was my own mother. It was her prayers that helped me through some of the hardest times of my young adult life. Even though I said some very hurtful things to her and treated her wrong, she turned around and got on her knees and prayed for me. I was humbled when I had to admit my jealousy, resentment and un-forgiveness.

Come on, be honest with me, I’m not alone here am I? Have you ever set your anger on the wrong foe? Are you demanding that flesh and blood pay you back for the pain showered on you? Have you allowed your rage for revenge to blind you from the truth? I wonder, how many of us have fought with a fellow victim, all the while ignoring the one true enemy at work.

Ephesians 6: 12 says, “Our battle is not against flesh and blood, but a stronger enemy, rulers, authorities, powers of this dark world and spiritual evil in the heavenly realms.”

You and I need all the energy we muster to fight against our mutual foe. Some of us, however, are wasting time, energy and emotions on things and people which are robbing from us our peace and stability.

So, what are some things you can do to make sure you are really fighting the right enemy?
1. Look at who you it is you are fighting? Is it flesh and blood? If it is, are you wasting your time? Think it through, they may be used as puppets but they are not the root enemy.  Every human being is being used, never the mastermind.  So that means that even though that person is destroyed, your enemy can pop up somewhere else.
2. Remember that Satan is out to destroy everything God has designed you to be. He will not play fair and he will not come at you in a way that’s obvious. John 10:10 says,

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.”

3.  Draw closer to God.  Incorporate in your life habits that will help you draw closer to God in order for you to see and hear God better. James 4:7 says that we need to submit ourselves to God. That means we are going to lay down the authority we have over our lives and circumstances and place them in Gods care. Once we give God complete power over our lives we can then see with clearer lenses who our real enemy.

“Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.” – James 4:7-8

Weekly Challenge

Is there somethings that the enemy has stolen from you, destroy or killed and you have been fighting flesh and blood for. t? Take sometime to confess that to God.  Let him, in return, show you some areas that you need to submit to God.  We would love for you to share your thoughts and comments below (at your comfort level).

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It’s Just an Idea

“Can you truly understand the character of God personally, without knowing that there is an enemy?” I mean, it is possible for us to understand who God truly is if the “idea” of Satan’s existence is erased? So think about it, if someone comes into church with no knowledge of God or Satan and those in the church only educated them on God and who He is without telling them that there is an enemy, can they truly understand who God is?

I asked this question in a bible study group and the debate was on. A few stayed quiet as they meditated on the question. Others said, “Yes, of course we can know God without having to know about Satan; why should we have to know about Satan in order to know God?” It was a ludicrous question to them. Then I gave my answer, “Absolutely not. There is no way to truly understand God in your personal life without knowing about Satan.” Do you disagree with me as well; are you shocked by my answer? Well, let me explain.

There was a movie that came out in 1995 that was quite unusual. The film is about a group of men arrested for a crime. The crime was not witnessed by anyone except for one lone, frail, crippled, survivor who gives the detectives a very detailed account of the events that took place. Throughout the movie, this witness is naming the criminals and the parts they played in this very intricate crime.  When the frail man finishes his statement and gives the detectives everything they need to catch the criminals involved, he passively gets his things and limps out. As he is walking away from the precinct, his limp slowly turns into a firm stride and a smile appears on his face. We find that this “Apparently” helpless man was in fact the criminal master mind. As the viewer is watching the visual transformation, the unexpected thought comes over your mind, “It couldn’t have been this weak, frail, lame man could it?” It slowly becomes evident to the detectives and then to us the audience “HE DID IT!!” Then there is a narration given by the master mind who says something that we all need to realize.

“The greatest lie the Devil ever told, was convincing the world that he didn’t exist.”

Why in the world is convincing the world that he doesn’t exist, going to work in his favor? Let me tell you my story. I had been going to church since I was six years old; I gave my heart to God when I was eleven. In that time, I was given details about God, angels, Heaven and Hell, but I was not given as much detail about Satan. I was living with a father who was always teetering on his blind rage if he was not getting high or staggering from addiction to vodka. I had to walk on egg shells never knowing what would set him off. Add to that the fact that when I was five years old, my cousin treated me like a five-cent prostitute while my father slept in the next bed in the same room.

All God But No God

How does one resolve in their mind that a God who is all-knowing, all-present, all-powerful let this happen? How does one not question what the use is of serving an all-knowing God when he won’t stop painful events. What kind of God would be present at such detestable behaviors? What kind of God is so all-powerful that He can make the seas, mountains, and galaxies but can’t stop a 150 pound man from beating me to the point where I can’t control my bowels?  At the age of 7 years old, I was told that God was in control of everything that happened in this world. I was told that He was watching over me and that He could protect me. So if you tell only these facts to a little girl, or anyone in my situation, how could they really comfortably embrace God? How could anyone truly love a God who is all-powerful, but doesn’t stop the crimes being done? How does one think God is a “Good God” when all that is being presented is bad?

Don’t Be Fooled

Believe it or not, that’s exactly what Satan wants. If Satan erases his own existence from humanity and allows us to highlight the existence of God and even God’s true, genuine, pure character, then the balance is off. It leaves us questioning the events of our lives and the state of the world we live in. It causes us to question the true power of God, the true love of God, the true nature of the God we are being told to serve.

As the discussion went on in the bible study I told them that when we focus on only the attributes of God, we take away the believer’s power. Understand, this is not a question of the existence of God. That is, in fact, the problem if one is told only of this all powerful, all knowing, and in control of everything God. That alone can give Satan so much power because we can’t and won’t fight an enemy if we don’t know of his existence. He can attack, keep us bound, keep us delusional and there is nothing we will do about it.

At the age of thirteen my older brother—who was a born-again Christian—came to live with us after ten years of separation. The knowledge that my brother gave me would be like air to my lungs. One day he spent hours talking to me about the other side of this walk with God. He wasn’t glorifying Satan, but he was revealing his existence to me. He showed me scriptures backing up everything he was saying so that I was not just hearing about his experiences, but seeing it in the Word for myself. As he spoke, it was like scales falling off my eyes. Here is one of the verses I used last week.
“The thief comes only in order to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance [to the full, till it overflows]” -John 10:10 (AMP)

This was powerful to me. But what if the part about the thief was taken away? It would say,
“I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance [to the full, till it overflows].”

I would have questioned why I was not enjoying my life because I felt dead and lifeless. But when I looked at the text in its fullness, I saw that there is someone trying to steal from me, kill the life I am living and destroy me and anything I try to build and it’s not God.  He not only told me about the enemy, but my brother spent many days showing me where God’s fingerprints were left in my life. He brought to life the statement, “Knowledge is power.” My brother would show me how much of my father’s behavior was a pure attack from Satan. Not only did he show me how Satan works, but he showed me how I didn’t have to let him continue to victimize me without making him regret it. One of the verses my brother loved was,

Luke 10:19 “I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you.”

WHAAATTT!! God has given me the authority and the ability to OVERCOME the power of the enemy?? Wait….and NOTHING will harm me?? I want that!

How Do I Overcome My Enemy?

The bible tells us of the many weapons to use to overcome the enemy.

Prayer- This weapon gives you a relationship with God who knows the tactics of the enemy.  He may not give you all the details of what is coming but in our times of prayer God will teach us how to fight up coming battles.

Our Faith- It is our faith that presses us through times of unanswered questions.  It is our faith that we hold on to when doubt and deception come knocking on the, it is our faith that gives us the strength to ignore their visit.

Perseverance- Is something we use to pick ourselves up when we fall down on the battlefield.  To think that we won’t fall down during these battles, is a deception we create on our own.  Perseverance is what a righteous man uses when he falls down 7 times, (proverbs 24:16) he can only fall that man times because he gets up.  This weapon makes us get up one more time an we fall.

The Word of God– is not just Basic Instruction before leaving earth.  There is nothing BASIC about these instructions.  If it is so basic we should be able to do it without any issues.
There is one more weapon that I believe Satan fears above all. It is a weapon, if used right that can defeat the hold that the enemy can have over us as individuals. It is OBEDIENCE”. In our spiritual lives, everything we pray for, have faith in, or read about will only be achieved through obedience. Think about it. When things seem so bad and you don’t have the strength to pray it is your “obedience” to do so that will give you your break through. When things look too impossible for you, “obedience” is required to press forward. It is “obedience” that pushes us to get in the Word when we don’t feel like reading and studying it. Simply put, our obedience in following Gods commands and ways mess up all that the enemy can throw at us. You can’t see God for who he, overcome your obstacles, and see your life change without following through with everything God tells you to do.

Weekly Challenge:

Do you feel like you are fighting something but you don’t know what it is? Do you feel like God is not being seen in your life? Is it possible that you aren’t seeing the enemy for who he really is? I believe that it’s time for us to make our fight count.  Take some time this week to see some areas you may allow the enemy to bring deception.

Start a conversation or email us on the side for additional help.  Follow us on Facebook or Instagram @throughthewinters.com

Also, our newest book is out!!

We have worked really hard to talk about the war that Christians are in. We are meant to win every battle set before us but there are many times we get in our way.  What are some things we need to learn in order to never lose another spiritual battle again?  Buy our Book on Amazon to find out.

Are you a fighter?  Fighters are people that on’t just sit back and allow themselves to be stepped on over and over again.  There comes a time when you say enough is enough.  But what if you are struggling with those that are on your side?  Sometimes you are so focused on not being taken advantage of that you are not aware of who you are fighting.  This Vlog is challenging you to stop fighting for a moment to evaluate if your struggle is with the right person.

Do You Really Know What’s Good for You

How can we tell the difference between good and evil?  Good, for example, can be the job promotion, the new girlfriend/boyfriend or the cool new friend that seems so spontaneous.  Meanwhile, evil can be seen in the form of the friend that abandons us, being overlooked or rejected at the job and the breakup from a significant other.  We can easily limit our definition to these two entities (good and evil) according to our everyday situations and circumstances.    Sometimes we think that the two can be identified without a doubt.  If we are honest, sometimes we have a hard time looking back in our lives and seeing the good and saying so and looking at the evil and truly saying it was “evil.”   The two may not be able to be seen as black and white; because our thoughts and hearts are tainted with past pain, hurt or disappointments.

After choosing to serve God, many usually discover that some of the views and perspectives they held were now challenged by seeing thing with new eyes.  Priorities and needs have shifted and, in many cases things, were important before make room for new goals and life choices.  In accepting a life that follows Christ, many of us have had to look at ourselves and see what needed to be worked on or developed.  In believing, that in God all things are “good”, we are forced to look at what lines up with the ways God has laid out us verses what may be “evil”.   Scripture teaches that our thoughts are not God’s thoughts; our ways are not his ways.  For many, if not properly taught after salvation, it can become confusing on where the line is between good and evil on the foundation of their Christian walk. After all how do we fight evil if we don’t know what evil looks; the lens of good and evil is blurred.  Likewise, how do we know when good is when the results don’t seem good?

So what would it look like if good and evil had a conversation?  How would that go?  For me, I think it would look something like this…

Can You Tell Them Apart?

Evil: (Looks at Good with disgust) You know, the two of us are not that much different.

Good:  How do you figure (Perplexed)?

Evil: You speak as if you don’t know.  You and me are practically brothers.  I mean it’s like as if we were twins at war with each other in a woman’s womb.  Come on!   We grew on the same tree for goodness sake.  We were both in the garden together watching everything unfold.

Good:  I don’t care what you think of me, I am nothing like you.

Evil: Oh really (sarcastically).  You speak as if you are better than me, but you and I are so identical that people sometimes can’t even tell us apart.  People call me “Good” while calling you “Evil”.  Don’t you see?  (waits for a response).  I can do something so wicked and dark like bombing a group of people that everyone hates and they will call it good.  I can bring death to a rapist or murder and people will celebrate calling it justice.  I can set traps and raise up strongholds in peoples and yet they call my deeds good.  While you (laughing) give life, expose my deeds and try to build and rebuild what I have destroyed; they label you as evil.  That must stink for you.  It’s funny how people quote the scripture, “what you meant for evil God meant it for Good.”  Well guess what, I do that every day and switch it on them.  I take what was meant for good and turn it around for my desire day in and day out and they fall for it.

Good: (starting to get upset) Who you are, and who I am is not dependent on the definition of man.  My identity is not based on what YOU think of me nor is it based on what man thinks of what defines me.

Evil: Ha ha ha…You speak as if you are humble but let’s speak candidly.  No one is listening.  Don’t we thrive on the same emotions, love and hate?  We push them to love what we love and hate what we hate.  We both manipulate them because we grow when they do as WE desire.  You see you appear to be selfless but you are just as selfish as I am.  It hurts you just as much as it hurts me, when they resist us.

Good: How so?

Evil:  We both become stronger and more powerful when humans indulge in what we represent.  Come on admit it.

Good: (says nothing)

Evil: You see your silence speaks loudly.  (Evil walks around to the other side of Good)  There is one last thing.  I know you don’t want to admit it because it will show your weakness.  We both have a sick secret that is hidden well.  You refuse to speak the truth but why don’t you just say it.

Good: Say what?

Evil: Come on.  Just say it.

Good: I have no idea what you’re talking about.

Evil: Oh you want me to come out and say it.

Good: (Silence)

Evil: Okay…I’ll say it then.  (With a voice like a slithering snake) You need me (He whispers).

Good: What?!  That’s ludicrous.

Evil: Don’t act so surprised.  You know that the only way one can truly understand what is good, evil must be present for comparison.  Come on, when this world was created you were in everything made by God.  It is even spoken of in the Bible—after every different element was made by the creator, he said it was “good”.  I was nowhere to be found.  But man was not satisfied with you were they?  It wasn’t until they discovered me that they realized what they lost in having you.  When I was given life after that first bite, your value was really seen.  Destruction, pain, rampage, and devastation of lives made you really shined.  A person craved “good”, they want to be “good” but “evil” was so much easier.  No one would even know who you are unless I was present.  You would just be a way of life an everyday action and no one would even know of what you are, but with me around, I make you look… well, good.

Good:  Yes, you’re right.  We thrive on hate and love but it is what we hate and love that makes us so different.  I hate you.  I hate everything about you.

Evil: (Snickers)

Good:  Man may not be able to differentiate between you and I because man allowed you into their lives.

Evil:  They wanted me not you!  Every man wants to fulfill their most evil desires even if it’s birthed with you in mind.  They want “good” in their lives but still choose to find it in me!

Good:  Man has allowed you to distort their view of life calling good – evil and evil – good but there is one thing that is different between us.  There is line that drawn between you and I.

Evil:  What are you talking about? (sarcastic)

Good:  The reason you thrive so much is because you are birthed through lies and deception.  You are built on the backs of prideful beings that could not handle the power of truth.  Your roots come from one who allowed pride to make him believe that he was greater than the Creator.  Your master has lost everything that made him worth something and now uses you to make humans believe a lie.  It is there that the line between you and I is drawn.  My master, the Creator of all things doesn’t use me as yours does to you.  My master offers me as a weapon and as a means to show life and truth.  Choosing to do “good” will not always be easy for them, but the results will cause them to keep doing so.

We Are Victims of Evil or the Victors of Good

You and I are victims of evil’s need to grow in this dying world.  Victimized by evil, are we adequately identifying which part of our painful story is the work of our enemy and what part of it is the grace and mercy of good?

When I was in my 30’s I found a journal from when I was a teenager.  In it I read of a time where I could not see God because He was overshadowed by an umbrella of evil.   I got so emotional as I read my words.  I was recalling being about 8 years old trying to seduce a 18 year old man.  I went on to talk about a young kid who sexually assaulted me and the comfort I found in his attack; it was the only way I knew of affection.  I was desperate for love at such a young age that I did the unthinkable to fulfill my needs.  I was rejecting God while going after the things that were killing me.  I found comfort in turmoil while finding torment in peace.

When I gave my heart to the Lord there was a war that raged in me.  I remember laying my bed crying randomly because I was choosing the opposite of what I wanted.  I was ripping up my bed and clinching my fist because I had so much rage.   I was so confused because I had God in my life and I thought that He was all I needed, but I learned that giving my life to God was only one part of my battle.  It was the beginning of a war that I would not won overnight.  I needed to renounce the evil that I allowed to lead my decisions and ask God to help me to understand what good looked like.  You see I knew about how “good” God was so I wanted Him, but I still lived and behaved in evil ways.

The war between good and evil lies in us.  What God calls evil may be the very thing we want to hold on to and label good because it feeds the side of us that we think we need.  During the month of March, we will be focusing on the spiritual battle that lies within us because the other part of this walk is that we have a real enemy that is going to do everything he can to keep us in the pond of lies that we are swimming in.  He fights harder everyday to hide his deeds and schemes from us so that we can stay disillusioned and helpless but GOD has made a way for us.  Check out all the articles in this month’s topic.  Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @throughthewinters.com.

Also, our newest book is out!!

We have worked really hard to talk about the war that Christians are in. We are meant to win every battle set before us but there are many times we get in our way.  What are some things we need to learn in order to never lose another spiritual battle again?  Buy our Book on Amazon to find out.

Have you ever thought that God lost sight of you?  Not just that you lost sight of God but that he lost you?  Sometimes we forget God is control of everything and has never once taken his eye off his creation.  He looks into our world and sees everything and is in the business of taking the ugly parts of our past and making them into beautiful mark of his glory.  Kaylee has been such a blessing as she has shared for the past three weeks.  She has spoken to us about her struggle with addiction, an abusive relationship, a failed suicide attempt, and about physical and mental illness.  After coming face to face with what true hopelessness looked like, Kaylee truly surrendered her heart to Jesus Christ.  She broke up with her boyfriend, left her addictive behavior and sought God for physical and mental healing.  But her story doesn’t end there.

Meeting My Other Half

I am sure you are wondering what happened to me, by now. Today I can confidently say I have been given what I don’t deserve. What do I deserve?  Punishment, I deserved punishment for my actions.  I deserved to go to jail for purchasing and consuming illegal drugs.  I deserved to die when I tried to take my life.  I thought I didn’t deserve a good man.  I didn’t deserve someone who would take care of me when I was sick and I didn’t deserve love.

 One day my life changed when I met a wonderful man name Vincent.  He and I met through James River Church, in Missouri.  We met after prayer service one evening, and that’s where it all began.  We spent many weeks getting to know each other, fasting, and praying about our future together.  We went out one evening to Phelps Grove Park to discuss what life would look like as a couple and decided to take a leap of faith. From that point forward, we spent our time eating lots of pizza, serving in the church, going out with friends, taking walks, and watching movies.

On February 5, 2017 we went on a walk at Phelps Grove, per usual, and I experienced the biggest surprise of my life. Vincent took me to the exact bench where we had our first conversation about becoming a couple. We talked about how far we had come since our first time at the park, all of the memories that had been made, and that was when Vincent said he had a very important question to ask me.  As I tried to catch my breath and prepare myself for the biggest moment of my life, Vincent got on one knee and asked if I would marry him.  Before I knew it, our two close friends, popped out from behind the tree and had captured the entire moment on video.  It was the most perfect day.

I Took Off My Mask

That is the happy, sappy, problem-free story.  Now let’s talk about what made me say “yes”.  One night I had gone to his house after a Bible study.  He was lounging, watching TV, and I asked if I could show him something. At the Bible study, someone had recorded someone prophesying over my life. They talked about the identity I had found in God and how I would be used to reach hurting people through my own pain. It was so powerful I couldn’t help but share it with Vincent. In order to do so, however, I had to let him in on my story – my pain. But that meant that he would run from me once I told him. So I said, “I have to tell you something.” -preparing for the worst. I told him I had been raped, abused, that I struggled with alcoholism and drug addiction, and that I was really sick.

All he knew to do was hold me as he said, “I like you more because of your story.”  He said he felt like God gave him a spiritual gift to love people who had been through abuse. In that moment, I felt safe with a man for the first time.

If you have been a faithful reader you will remember in October we wrote an article called “Stubborn Love.”  In this article we focused on her husband.  These two people went through so much before God brought them together.  Click to read his story.

There is a story that reminds me of Kaylee and it’s found in the book of Ruth 4.   There were many differences but both lost everything.  Ruth was from Moabite who married an Israelite man.  Sadly her father-in-law, brother-in-law and her husband all died after getting sick, leaving her mother in law, Naomi with no one to care for her.  Because of the custom of the day, women could not own property or land.  With no men around Naomi lost everything she had.  Since neither Ruth and her other daughter in law had no children, she encouraged them to go back to their families and remarry.  Even though she could have gone back to her people and begin over again, Ruth decided to stay with Naomi.  She even decided and decided to accept the God of Israel as her one and only God.  In the eyes of everyone else there was nothing left for Ruth and Naomi since they had no men to take care of them.  Ruth trusted in God as Kaylee did.

Because of Ruth’s and Naomi’s hope and faith in God they were placed on a path that provided them with a future.  God took the ashes of Ruth’s burned up, devastated life, and brought her before a man by the name of Boaz.  Boaz was a distant relative of her husband and truly loved Ruth.  Ruth soon fell for him as well and when Boaz married her, she became a restored woman.  Naomi was restored as well.  Maintaining her position as Ruth’s mother in law, with the covering of Boaz, she was able to reclaim the land that once belonged to her husband and sons.

God Our Redeemer

Ruth and Naomi had a lonely death in their future but they were redeemed by one who had the power to restore them and give them worth all over again.  This is how it is with God and us.  In Him we are given new life and worth.  This is what Kaylee found in here walk with God.  Even though death thought it had her, it had to set her free when “God the Redeemer” became a part of her life.

On August 11, 2017 Vincent and I were happily married. I remember hearing him say his vows and being in complete awe that I had a man who would keep his word.  He prays for me. He prays with me. He prepares my weekly medications and reminds me to take them. He carries me when I can’t walk. He holds me when I can’t speak. He feeds me when I can’t feed myself. He serves the Lord and loves the Church. He laughs at me and with me. He hears my concerns and takes time to understand them. He is everything I don’t deserve, but God gave him to me anyway. He is a man beyond worthy of saying “I DO” to.

Vincent saw my anxiety and illnesses firsthand while we were dating, but being married, my Post Traumatic Stress Disorder is more evident than ever. He sees me shut down when I hear loud noises. He experiences my panic attacks when I sense disapproval. He sees the rage and pain in my eyes when I hear about pornography. All the while, he constantly learns about my illnesses and does everything in his human power to take care of me. To see a man care about my emotional and mental well being—as much as my physical well being—is one of the biggest turn-ons- and indicators that he is my partner for life.

 I have not completely healed from my past, but I am healing. I haven’t arrived, but God is working on me each day. I was victimized but I am not the victim. I am affected by sickness and pain but my identity is not “sick.” I am a child of God and that is the identity I choose to live by.

 As of July 5, 2017 I am one year sober. I have not been drunk and I have not smoked weed almost a year before.  I have been free from debilitating anxiety and the doctors have provided a service dog to help me with daily tasks.  Through my pain and healing, I have found a deep passion and desire to help hurting people. I feel compelled to lead young women by example to help them live a life of success rather than regret. As of November 06, 2017 I am the Project Manager for the Assemblies of God National Youth Ministries. Taking this position has been incredibly humbling. God chose to use the broken, pain-filled, post-addiction, baby Christian to have a voice in the teenagers of the United States. My office is across the street from the Psych Ward.  Right out my office window I can see the exact room where I was admitted for suicide risk. God truly takes what Satan meant to kill us to make us thrive.

I have a life filled with love, joy, and fulfillment. I love my dog, my cat, my husband, and finding peace through yoga. I now use my story to help those suffering with chronic and mental illnesses through my website:
takeyourhealing

Weekly Challenge:

Don’t let your feelings dictate your life. Feelings are not always truth.  Just because you feel worthless that does not mean you are worthless. And just because you feel invisible it doesn’t mean you are invisible.  The only way you can be certain of who you are and what you should do, despite your feelings, is to know God for who He really is and you begin to do that do that by reading His word.

Also if you are struggling with deep issues and need professional help, we have a connection to Bedrock Counseling ministries.  Go to our “Contact Us” and at the bottom of the page is a number to call.  They have professional counselors who will help you through these painful times.  Follow us on facebook and instagram @throughthewinters.com.  We love you and appreciate you.

Take a few minutes to watch this video.